Einstein's Definition Of Insanity
by Risknight
Summary: After Leonard tries to move in with her, Penny takes a good hard look at her life and doesn't like what she sees. It's time to stop doing the same thing over and over and hoping for a different result. Losing Penny from his life makes Sheldon think about what is truly most important to him.
1. Chapter 1

**I am about to rant. If you love the new season of TBBT, don't read on. **

**I loved the first three seasons of The Big Bang Theory. To me season four was okay, but not great. Seasons 5 and 6 had one really good thing going for them. Howard and Bernadette's relationship. I hated the stupid gay innuendo's the writers had Raj spouting. I hated that in most episodes Penny was drunk, or drinking heavily. Leonard is whiny and degrading to Penny. I love Mayim, but Amy was manipulative and overbearing. Sheldon was becoming weaker and more ignorant with each passing episode. Come on, let's be serious. Would the Sheldon Cooper who made Penny wear a wig for authenticity ever wear a Raggedy Andy cap over his C-3PO costume? Of course not! I miss the strong, likable, enthusiastic characters we saw in the first few seasons. **

**What used to be a wonderfully well-written show full of humor, intelligence and creativity has regressed into bad sex jokes, degrading stereotypes and low-brow "humor". So, like the arrogant and egotistical person I am, I have re-written season 6 to suit my own tastes. Shenny abounds in these chapters.**

* * *

Leonard unlocked the door to the roof excitedly. He looked over his shoulder at the others. "This is going to be so cool! The meteor is going to enter right above us, and we should get a really good view of it burning up as it hits the atmosphere!"

Sheldon, Raj, Howard, Amy, Bernadette and Penny settled in on various seats and watched as Leonard set up the high resolution camera.

Raj checked his watch and then leaned over to whisper in Howard's ear. "Better hurry. It should show up in 2 minutes, according to Raj's calculations."

Penny leaned back on the overturned flower bed and looked up at the night sky. The city lights were too bright to see many stars. She closed her eyes and silently made a wish.

Penny looked at Leonard and wondered when she became such a coward. When had she given up and let convenience dictate her life? When had she decided to do what was easy and let others chose what she should do? She let Sheldon, Amy and Bernadette keep her in a relationship she didn't want. She let Leonard separate her from all of her old friends. When was the last time she had chatted with Gail? Or gone to the mall with Karen? No, she spendt all her time with Leonard, Amy, Bernadette and Raj. Why? Because otherwise Leonard got jealous and crabby.

She had let him whittle away at her confidence until she didn't even have the courage to submit a paper _she_ wrote to her teacher. No, she had made Amy and Bernadette write it for her.

She thought about the appointment she had gone to this morning. She had been having stomach pains for a week or so. So, she took the day off, and went to see her doctor. A few tests, and an ultra sound later, and she had heard the bad news. An ulcer. Actually, she had two. She wasn't even 30 yet and she had ulcers. When Dr. Sargent had asked if she was stressed, it had all come pouring out. Things that she was upset about. Things she hadn't even realized were bothering her.

Like the isolation. The drinking until she was numb enough to not care anymore. The way Leonard always wanted to have sex, but never asked how her day was. She had almost let him move in, damn it! Why? Because she was too scared of upsetting the group by telling him no. He had announced he was going to live with her, and she had buckled. Thank heaven Sheldon had told Amy she didn't want Leonard moving in, or right now she'd be sharing bathroom cabinet space.

Well, this was it. Her last night with this group. The last time she and Leonard had broken up, she had lost the group for a while. Until Sheldon had come over for spaghetti. That wouldn't happen this time. Sheldon had Amy now. She hadn't seen much of him in the last few months. Not unless it was a couples thing. And since she wouldn't be half of a couple anymore, she doubted she would see any of them.

Bernadette gasped and drew everyone's attention to the sky. They could see the small flare of the meteor as it began to burn up. The clicking of the camera was drowned out by the street noises. It only lasted a couple of minutes and then it was gone.

Penny looked around at the people she cared about most. Raj was texting his friend Lucy. Bernadette and Howard were kissing passionately. Amy was trying to coax Sheldon into kissing her. Leonard was putting away the camera and looking over at her with desire in his eyes. Penny stood and headed back down the stairs. She entered her apartment, and left the door open. She knew he would be down in moments.

She poured a glass of milk and drank half of it. Sure enough, Leonard walked in a minute later. He shut the door and began unbuttoning his shirt.

"Don't bother," she said softly. Leonard paused and looked at her with confusion. Penny set the glass down and picked up a small box from the counter. She walked over and set it on the couch. "These are all of your things you have left here. I'm ending our beta test, Leonard. Please leave."

Leonard laughed. "Is this a joke?"

Penny shook her head. "No joke, Leonard. I don't want to be in this relationship anymore. You're a nice guy, but it's not working. Surely you can see that."

Leonard's face turned pale, then red, then pale again. "Penny, you don't mean that! You love me! I love you! How can this not be working?"

Penny looked at him sadly. "I do love you, Leonard. But I'm not in love with you. I'm sorry, but I'm miserable. It's not just you. It's everything. Everything from the dead end job I have, to the struggle to meet my bills every month. And this. This relationship is part of it."

Leonard's hands clenched at his side. "Penny, how can you say that? I treat you like a princess! I would do anything for you!" He closed the distance between them and tried to kiss her, but she turned her head away. His eyes narrowed. "You've met someone else, haven't you? Some muscle bound ape at school?"

Penny pulled away from him. "There is no one else, Leonard. This is part of the problem. Your jealousy! You don't trust me. You act like I'm a heartbeat away from jumping into bed with the next guy I meet!"

"You've done it before!" Leonard shouted. He jerked back in shame. "Penny, I didn't mean that!"

She smiled wryly. "Yes, you did. You claim you love me, but you think I'm easy. Despite the changes I made, you don't trust me."

Leonard scoffed. "What changes? School? You didn't even want me to know about that!"

"Leonard, I gave up all of my friends for you. I don't go anywhere unless I'm with you, Amy or Bernadette. I have no life outside of you and this group. I started school to better myself for you. I cut myself off from everything I enjoyed for you. And you didn't even notice. Our whole relationship consists of three things. Sex, jealousy and convenience. I want more than that. I deserve more than that. And so do you." Penny hugged her arms around her middle and blinked away the tears trying to form. "Leonard, I'm so unhappy that it's starting to affect my health. I can't do this anymore. Not to myself or to you."

Leonard thought of the opportunity with Alex he had passed up because he was with Penny. He thought of the crappy way Penny had acted on Valentine's. He thought of the way she would blow him off for her study group once a week. "So you get to just decide this without giving me a chance to have my say?"

Penny nodded. "Yes. You can't have a relationship if one person doesn't want it. It takes two to make it work, Leonard, and I'm not willing to be involved anymore."

Leonard snatched up the box and opened the door. He looked back at Penny with a sneer. "You'll regret it. And when you come crawling back, I may not want you anymore." He slammed the door behind him and Penny sank down into the armchair. She wasn't surprised she felt relief. She was just surprised by how much relief she felt.

She stood and locked the door, even the dead bolt. Then she turned off her phone and crawled into bed. Tomorrow was going to be tough. It would be even tougher without any sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**This chapter overlaps the previous one, only from Sheldon's POV.**

* * *

Sheldon watched her in his peripheral vision. Lately he had begun to notice a shift in his perception of Penny. At first he had attributed it to lack of interaction. He and Penny rarely spent much time together anymore, and it was reasonable that he would miss her since he was so used to her being around.

Then Amy and Bernadette had been fighting and Penny ended up with a broken nose. He had been appalled by the callous lack of concern that his friends had for Penny's welfare. Even Leonard, who was supposed to love her, had laughed and teased her about not ducking in time. It took him a couple of weeks to figure out why that angered him.

He cared about Penny. She was more than just a friend. He spent the last two weeks looking back over the history between them. He always asked her to take care of him when he was sick. He had taken the bus to see her, for goodness sake! He even took care of her when she was injured. He never took care of Leonard. Okay, so he once took care of Amy, but only because he knew if he didn't, Penny would have been disappointed in him. He had been in the hallway, about to leave when he thought of how Penny would react to him abandoning her bestie.

He was forever moving her on and off his mortal enemies list. He never did that for anyone else! Only one other person had ever been removed from the list, and that was because Wil Wheaton had given him a collectable! Penny had once been removed from it because she watched Doctor Who with him. And he removed her even though she talked through the entire episode!

He worried about her. Every time he did see her, she was drinking. Penny was no teetotaler, but it seemed to him that her drinking had escalated to an alarming degree ever since she and Leonard had renewed their carnal activities. She wasn't happy and it hurt him to see her this way. Sheldon was certain he cared for Penny more than he should.

Bernadette drew everyone's attention to the sky and he watched as the meteor burned brightly. He felt Amy slip her hand into his and he sighed. He thought about the question Penny had posed him a couple of weeks ago. Would he really be open to a physical relationship someday? He was more comfortable with touch now than he was a year ago, but he still found it unpleasant.

He rolled his eyes as his left eyebrow twitched. Okay, so he didn't find _everyone's_ touch unpleasant. He had hugged Penny several times, and enjoyed each one. Often Penny, a very touchy-feely person, would touch his arm, shoulder, or back. He never minded her close proximity on the couch, although he did mind if others got too close.

For a long time he had convinced himself his lack of objection to Penny's touch was just him being resigned to her personality. Lately he had started to wonder if there wasn't a deeper meaning to it.

"Sheldon, this is so romantic. I would like to invoke section 4 of article 32 of our relationship agreement," Amy said.

He frowned. "The spontaneity clause?"

Amy nodded. "I want a kiss, Sheldon."

He looked at her with a stunned expression. He noticed Penny standing and heading for the stairwell. Where was she going? His stomach twitched. He looked down at Amy's upturned face. He tensed up and bent his head. He placed a quick, chaste kiss on her cheek and jerked back away. He ignored the flash of disappointment in Amy's eyes. He was not going to feel guilty. She had been in his life long enough to know his quirks and phobias. And she had been in his life long enough for him to know she would keep pushing. It seemed like they were forever in some sort of relationship balancing act.

From the left he saw Leonard hurrying toward the stairs. Off to engage in carnality, he supposed. Sheldon's stomach fluttered ominously again. That was beginning to happen more often lately. He swallowed the lump in his throat. How much longer was he going to be able to do this? How much longer was he going to be able to hide this? How would his friends and girlfriend react when they discovered his secret affection for Penny?

Sheldon stood and brushed off his pants. Amy rose up beside him. She looked at him expectantly and he silently sighed. He led the way back down to the 4th floor and moved into the kitchen. He had no desire to sit on the couch. Amy would want to cuddle since technically it was date night. He put on a kettle and placed his wooden tea case on the table.

"What blend would you like?" he asked calmly.

Amy sat down and looked over the selection. "I will have raspberry tonight."

Sheldon placed the appropriate teabag in her cup and selected peppermint for himself. Penny's favorite, he noticed. "How is your new study proceeding?"

Amy shrugged. "I am dispensing opiates to starfish. It is quite boring. I miss the monkeys sometimes."

Sheldon pulled out a chair for himself, but before he could sit, the front door opened and Leonard stormed in. They watched him stomp back to his room, carrying a box. Sheldon and Amy looked at each other and then toward the hall. The door opened again and the others walked in. Leonard's door slammed and he stomped back out to the living room. He looked at Howard, Raj and Sheldon.

"Penny broke up with me," he growled. "As my friends I expect you to stand by me." He looked at Sheldon. "That means you can't be her friend."

Sheldon felt a chill run down his spine. What had happened? Was Penny okay? What did Leonard mean he couldn't be friends with Penny? Why should their relationship ending affect his friendship with Penny?

"Leonard, that's not fair," Bernadette said. "Penny is our friend the same as you are. You can't just dictate who we are friends with."

Leonard glared at her, causing Howard to step forward protectively. "I mean Howard, Raj and Sheldon. Bros before hoes," he said, emphasizing the last word harshly.

Raj leaned over and whispered in Howard's ear. He nodded and took a deep breath. "Raj and Penny were supposed to go shopping for a birthday gift for his sister the day after tomorrow."

Leonard narrowed his eyes. "Fine. Go shopping with Penny." Raj looked relieved. "But you won't be welcome here anymore."

"Now wait a minute," Sheldon said quickly.

Leonard spun around to face him. "No! I live here, too! I am tired of Penny playing games with me! She knows how I feel about her! She just ripped my heart out and basically told me I had no say in the matter! I am tired of being disregarded! She puts everything before me! School, work, friends, everything! She doesn't get to break my heart and keep my friends! So chose. You're either my friend, or you're Penny's." Leonard's eyes flashed dangerously. "You can't be both." Leonard turned and stomped his way back down the hall.

Silence reigned for several minutes. Finally Amy walked out into the hall and knocked on Penny's door. The others watched from the doorway. She knocked several times. "Penny? It's Amy. Can we talk?"

Bernadette placed her ear on the door. "I don't hear anything," she whispered. "Maybe she went to bed."

Amy pulled out her phone and dialed Penny's number. After a moment she hung up. "She shut it off. It went straight to voicemail." Amy dialed Penny's number again. She put it on speaker. "You all need to hear this."

_Hey, this is Penny. I've turned off my phone for a couple of days. I know you have questions, but please respect my privacy. Thank you._

Everyone walked back into the apartment. Howard sat on the arm of the couch. "What do we do?" Everyone looked at him with surprise. He rolled his eyes. "Yeah, okay so last time I was all about Team Leonard, but let's be honest. Penny is our friend. She's never once abandoned us."

Bernadette sat on the couch and rested her head on Howard's leg. "I think we should wait a day or two and then figure out what to do. Give them both some time to settle down. Then we figure out what happened and how to fix it."

Amy took Sheldon's hand in hers and moved in close until their sides were pressed together. He let her, too. He needed the comfort as much as she did.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you everyone for the awesome reviews! I am glad so many have enjoyed this one. Well, the gang has honored Penny's request for a bit of space for a few days. But Sheldon never was a very patient man. He's tired of waiting. Time to check on his friend.**

* * *

Penny taped the last box shut and stood up. It was just after 1 pm. It had been three days since the break up and she had accomplished a lot. She had quit her job, written a handful of goodbye letters to be dropped off on her way out of town, and packed all her belongings. A moving van was due any minute to load everything and ship it to a storage facility. Penny was almost 30. She was going to start anew while she still had the courage to do it.

A knock on her door drew her across the room. She opened the door. "Hey, you're early."

"I didn't know I was expected at a certain time. Should I come back later?" Sheldon asked with confusion.

Penny nibbled her bottom lip. "Oh, hello Sheldon. I'm sorry. I didn't realize it was you, since you only knocked once. I was expecting someone else."

He looked at her closely. "I wasn't sure you would answer if you knew it was me. I left work early to speak with you. Who did you think I was?"

Penny sighed. "Some movers."

Sheldon peered around her. His eyes widened at the sight of the boxes. "You are moving?" he murmured softly.

Penny nodded. "Yes, Sheldon. I'm moving away. I have a friend who got me a job where she works. I need a fresh start. The job pays better, the cost of living where she lives is cheaper, and I won't be stuck in an endless loop of misery." She grabbed some envelopes off the sofa. "Could you give these to the others for me? I thought it would be easier to say goodbye this way. I'm sure Leonard and the guys don't feel much like speaking to me at the moment."

Sheldon paled as he looked into her eyes. "Penny, what happened? You weren't always miserable. Were you?"

Penny smiled softly. "No, sweetie. I wasn't. But I have been for a while now. These last couple of years have been getting more and more intolerable. I hate my job. I can barely pay my bills. I spent more on booze last week than I spent on food. I had a boyfriend who would ask for sex the minute he walked through the door, but would go a week without asking how I was. I can't stay here. Because I know me. I'm weak. I've tried three times with Leonard, even thought I knew better this last time. And I'll do it again if I stick around, because I hate to be alone."

"I don't want you to leave," Sheldon said in a low voice. "You are my friend, aren't you?"

Penny's eyes filled with tears. "Yes, but you don't need me, Sheldon. You have Leonard, Howard, Raj, Bernadette and especially Amy. You won't even noticed I am gone." Penny sighed. "I'm not sure any of the others will notice either."

Sheldon gasped. "How can you say that! Of course I will notice!' Sheldon looked down at the floor. "I will miss you, Penny."

Penny smiled softly. "I know it sounds awful, but I'm glad you'll miss me, sweetie. I'll miss you, too. But let's be honest, we haven't exactly been close this past year. Most weeks we only see each other when you come into the restaurant."

Sheldon looked at her with a plea. "I promise to spend more time with you."

Penny shook her head. "Sheldon, I can't stay. I just can't do it. It's affecting my health. I'm so unhappy I have developed ulcers. Being here is harmful to me, Sheldon. No matter how much I want to stay, I can't."

Sheldon stared at her for several seconds. Then he surprised her by stepping close and wrapping his arms around her tight. Penny hugged him back after a second. She felt his lips move near her ear. His voice was barely audible.

"Sie haben mein Herz." he whispered to her. Then he turned and hurried across the hall to his own apartment.

Penny was still standing there, staring at his door when the movers showed up 20 minutes later.

* * *

_Dear Sheldon,_

_Of everyone, I think I will miss you most. Because I have been missing you for over a year now. You have been a true friend to me. Generous, helpful, and honest. You always told me the truth, even when I didn't want to hear it, or it put you in danger of being punched. You challenged me, encouraged me, and cared about me, in your own way. I do not think I will ever meet anyone who fascinates me as much as you do. Please take care of yourself. I worry about you. You get so caught up in your work that you don't always notice the grandeur and beauty of life. Please take care of the others, too. They may not know it, or appreciate it, but they need you. I will be in touch when I feel that I can. Please grant me this time alone. I desperately need it. _

_Farewell, my dear friend,_

_Penny_

* * *

He didn't say anything to any of the others. He kept the letters hidden. Except his own. He had read it several times. Every night in fact. But he didn't say anything to the others about Penny moving. Sheldon treated it like a test. He waited to see how long it would be before they noticed.

Two days after she left, Leonard invited Alex over for dinner. Everyone spent an uncomfortable evening trying desperately not to show how much they disapproved of Leonard's actions. Alex was pleasant to everyone, trying very hard to fit in. Leonard was smug and kept holding Alex's hand.

A couple of days later Sheldon listened to Bernadette and Amy talk about trying to get together for a girl's night. Amy suggested calling Penny to invite her, and Leonard glared for a second. Then he smiled benignly. "Alex would probably love to join you. She's really anxious to get to know you both."

Bernadette and Amy hesitated a moment. Sheldon watched closely. Finally Bernadette nodded sadly to Amy and Amy looked at Leonard. "I guess it would be okay for her to come." Sheldon stood and walked into the bathroom. It was the only way to hide his anger at the two women.

It was Howard who finally realized what had happened. Sheldon was sitting at his desk typing up some equations when Howard walked in without knocking. He shut the door and locked it. He walked over and sat down on a chair. He stared at Sheldon for several seconds.

"You know she left, don't you?" he asked.

Sheldon closed his laptop. "Yes. She moved out 4 weeks ago."

Howard looked at him in shock. "4 weeks?" He ran a hand through his hair. "Do you know where she went?"

Sheldon reached into his messenger bag. He pulled out a letter and handed it to Howard. "She did not tell me. She only said that she needed to leave because she was unhappy."

Howard opened the letter and read it quickly. He sighed and folded it back up. "I can find her. It wouldn't be hard."

Sheldon nodded. "I know. Do you intend to?"

Howard looked at him. "You already know where she is, don't you?"

He shook his head. "I do not. Her letter to me expressed a desire that she be the one to contact me when she felt the time was right."

Howard looked at him with a knowing look. "Does Amy know about this?"

Sheldon stilled. "About Penny leaving?"

The engineer shook his head. "That you love Penny."

Sheldon blushed slightly but held Howard's gaze. "No. Only you do."

Howard felt a rush of sympathy for the strange genius. "What are you going to do, Sheldon?"

Sheldon stood and walked over to the door. "I have no damned idea." He said angrily. "Now, it is lunch time. Shall we?"


	4. Chapter 4

**Now that Howard knows, Sheldon has been asked a question he has wondered about himself. What will he do now? Does he wait for Penny to contact him, like she asked, or does he seek her out? You know Sheldon. He never acts spontaneously.**

* * *

Sheldon powered down his laptop and slipped it into the case. He stood and looked around the bedroom. "Now or never," he murmured. He pulled on his jacket and walked out of the room.

* * *

Amy opened her door and smiled with surprise. "Hello, Sheldon. This is a pleasant surprise!"

Sheldon stepped inside and watched his girlfriend move to the couch. He sat down beside her and reached into his bag. He set the letter on the coffee table. "Amy, I have not been completely honest with you."

She looked at him warily. "What do you mean?"

Sheldon looked down for a second. "I have not lied to you, but I have concealed some things from you. I like you, Amy. You are smart, funny and attractive. But I do not desire you the way you desire me. I have always said that I am not comfortable with the casual intimacy most others indulge in on a daily basis. That is not completely true. There is one person whose touch I not only do not mind, but looked forward to. One person I care for immensely."

Amy gasped and clenched her hands. He could see the knowledge in her eyes and wondered how long she had suspected. "Why did you ask me out if you wanted Penny?"

Sheldon cleared his throat. "I asked Penny out. She assumed I did so out of jealousy over your date with Stuart. She was partly right. I was jealous of you and Stuart. I wanted what you and Stuart so casually tried. Only I wanted it with Penny. She pushed me to you and I let her. Because I had no idea what to do."

"You used me," Amy whispered.

Sheldon shook his head adamantly. "No! I truly do care about you, Amy. I regret what I am doing now. Because I hate to see you hurting. I really tried, to the best of my inadequate abilities, to love you like you deserve. The failure of this relationship is on my shoulders."

Sheldon took a deep breath. "Penny moved 5 weeks ago. She left Pasadena. I don't know where she went, or if she will ever come back. But I'm going to find her. I have a starting point. She went to visit my sister for a couple of days. I am going to go see Missy and try to find Penny." He looked at Amy's anguished face. "I love her, Amy. I can't be without her. I hope you will forgive me someday."

He stood and moved to the door. Amy's voice stopped him. "What if she doesn't love you?"

Sheldon shrugged. "At least I will know that I tried." Sheldon opened the door and stepped into the hall. He heard a harsh sob and placed his palm on Amy's door. Pain lanced through him to know it was his fault. He turned and made his way down the hall. He had four more stops to make.

* * *

He rapped sharply on the door. It opened and a teenage girl looked at him with a sneer. "Dad! It's the crazy guy again! Want me to set the dogs loose?"

Sheldon briefly considered trying to blow up her head. A moment later his boss appeared in the doorway.

"What do you want, Cooper?" President Seibert asked wearily.

Sheldon handed him some paperwork. "I am requesting a sabbatical. I have a personal issue that I must attend to."

Seibert looked at the papers. "Couldn't this have waited until morning?"

Sheldon shook his head. "I am leaving in a couple of hours. I apologize for the short notice, but I only made up my mind this evening. I am leaving regardless of your decision. You can either grant my sabbatical, or fire me. At the moment I do not care which."

Seibert looked him over closely. "What is so important that you would risk a black mark on your career?"

Sheldon blushed slightly. "My friend Penny has broken up with Leonard and left town. I must find her and speak with her." Sheldon squared his shoulders. "I love her. I did not realize I did until she left. I must find her."

Seibert was silent for a long time. His wife walked over, having heard Sheldon's statement. She looked at the man who was the largest thorn in her husband's side, but also the biggest asset under his belt.

"Gordon?" she said softly. Seibert looked over at her, warmth in his gaze. "He sounds like you did when you spoke to my father."

Seibert turned back to Sheldon. "Good luck. I hope your sabbatical is a success, Dr. Cooper."

Sheldon nodded, relief evident in his expression. "Thank you, sir." Sheldon turned and walked back to the waiting taxi. He gave the driver another address and prepared himself.

* * *

Raj opened the door and looked at Sheldon anxiously. He could see Raj's girlfriend standing by the tv nervously. "I already know," he said. "Amy called me."

Sheldon nodded. "Then the only thing left to discuss is the work. I will check in with you weekly by skype to see if you need anything from me. I will send you daily emails to go over our progress. If you have any questions or problems, you may call me. I will continue to work on my theories, but they will not be my focus for the next few weeks. I will let you know when I will return as soon as I know myself." He handed Raj the letter Penny had left him.

Raj took it and looked at his name scrawled across the front. "Bring her back to us, Sheldon." He looked at his boss and friend. "Please."

Sheldon nodded with a serious expression. "I'll do the best I can."

Raj smiled suddenly. "The best you can? Then you have all but promised me."

Sheldon smiled slightly and turned to leave. He paused and turned back. "I have one request, though." He quickly explained and Raj readily agreed. Lucy stepped forward and offered to help. Sheldon thanked her with surprise.

* * *

Sheldon grew more and more uncomfortable as he watched Bernadette crying on Howard's shoulder. Howard was patting her arm soothingly, but she didn't seem to be calming down. Finally Sheldon stood. "I must go. I still have to speak to Leonard."

Howard gently pushed Bernadette off his arm. "I'll go with you. Leonard isn't going to take this well." Sheldon started to shake his head but Bernadette jumped up and wiped her eyes.

"Howie is right. Leonard is going to explode. We'll both go with you, Sheldon." She grabbed her purse and Howard's jacket.

Sheldon held out a hand. "That will not be necessary. I know Leonard is going to be angry. I am prepared for that."

Bernadette stalked over. "I said we're going with you, buster. Now, get moving. We don't have all night." Howard and Sheldon both 'eeped' at her forceful tone. No one wanted to mess with this Bernadette.

Sheldon paid the cab driver and settled into the back of Howard's car. He was dreading the upcoming talk, but it was necessary. He needed to clear the air and start this quest with a clean slate.

* * *

Sheldon stared in disbelief at the people in the lobby. Amy, Lucy and Raj stood waiting on them. Amy looked at him sadly. "I'm still upset with you, Sheldon, but you are right. We are friends. We are all friends. I guess we all kind of lost sight of that where Penny is concerned. Her letter…" Amy brushed away a tear trying to form. "I realize now how hard this past year was for her. Sheldon, she is hurting so badly."

Raj patted Amy's shoulder. He looked at Sheldon. "We can provide support. Leonard is going to lose it. He's always been a bit jealous of you. He has never forgotten that first day."

Sheldon frowned. "First day?"

Howard smirked. "The day you two met Penny. The way Penny went to your white board first, was impressed by your work the most. The way she called you a beautiful mind. He still brings it up a couple of times a year. Along with the way she took care of you, offered to give up that trip for you, the various wars you two have had. I think he knew deep down that you and Penny connected in a way he and Penny never did."

Amy nodded. "I've felt it, too. That's probably why I clung to you so tight. Why I made Penny my bestie. Because you and Penny spark off of each other, Sheldon. You two are like yin and yang. She's the electron to your proton. I wish it would have been me instead, but I think your heart was already taken long before you and I met." Tears filled her eyes again and Sheldon slumped.

"I am sorry, Amy."

She gave him a watery smile. "So am I."

Bernadette slipped an arm around Amy's waist comfortingly. "Okay, people. Into the lion's den. Sheldon has to get going." They all headed up the stairs with varying degrees of trepidation.


	5. Chapter 5

**Yippie! Got my first Shenny bashing review! That means I ticked off someone. I love those. Every time someone calls me delusional, or hateful for pairing Penny and Sheldon, I know I've written something that strikes a nerve with a Shamy fan. After all, no one gets mad and takes the time to bash something unless it makes them nervous or afraid. Fear away, dear guest reviewer. You won't get your review published unless you actually log in, but at least you have the knowledge that I saw it, and it made me happy. :)**

**Now, on to the "hateful Leonard bashing" part of our story.**

* * *

Leonard and Alex were sitting on the couch when everyone walked in. Well, Leonard was sitting on the couch. Alex was straddling his lap. Leonard looked a trifle smug as Alex moved to sit beside him. Sheldon pulled the final letter from his bag and set it on Leonard's desk. He turned to the couple and joined his hands behind his back.

"Alex, I am sorry to do this, but I am going to let you go. I have no further need of an assistant at the moment."

Leonard glared as Alex gasped. "Why? Because she's dating me?"

Sheldon shook his head. "No. Because I am taking a sabbatical. I spoke with President Seibert earlier and he has granted me time away. When I return I will contact you to see if you would like to return to my employment. However, I do not know how long I will be gone."

Leonard popped up off the couch, suspicion in his eyes. "Where are you going?"

Sheldon shook his head. "I do not know yet. Penny moved from here several weeks ago. I intend to search for her."

"Why?" Leonard growled aggressively.

Sheldon took a deep breath and looked his friend and roommate in the eye. "Because I love her, Leonard. Because I need to be with her."

"You bastard!" he hissed.

Howard and Raj closed ranks and edged between the two men. "Calm down, Leonard," Howard suggested. "Hear him out."

Leonard clenched his hands into fists. "Hear him out?! Hear him tell me that he is going to go after Penny? Hear him tell me he wants the woman I love?! What the hell, Sheldon?! Since when do you care about anyone?! Like Penny would ever go for you anyway, with all your snide comments and insults."

Behind him, Alex gasped. "You still love her?" Leonard looked at Alex uncertainly. He stared at her for a couple of seconds. Alex stood and walked over to him. "Were you just using me?"

Bernadette snorted. "You aren't exactly innocent, missy. You knew he was in a relationship when you started chasing him. If you don't want to be treated like the other woman, don't BE the other woman."

Alex narrowed her eyes and tried to stare Bernadette down.

Bernadette smirked. "Try me."

Alex snatched up her purse and stormed out.

Leonard turned and looked at Sheldon. "How could you?! What kind of friend are you?! Penny is mine! She always come back to me! She loves ME!"

Sheldon flinched from Leonard's tirade. He hated confrontation. It always made him feel weak and panicky. But this was for Penny, so he drew on his scant store of courage. "I am going to find her. I am going to tell her how I feel. I am going to do everything in my power to win her love. I love her, Leonard. I will not apologize for something I had no control over. Especially not something I do not regret. How you feel does not change how I feel. You have had years with Penny. It did not work. No matter how hard you both tried, you failed. I do not know if Penny can ever love me. I have been caustic and kept her at arm's length. But I have to try. If I don't, I will regret it for the rest of my life. Penny is the most important thing in the world to me. "

Leonard sneered. "More precious than your damned Nobel prize?"

Sheldon nodded without hesitation. "Yes."

Before anyone could react, Leonard sprang forward and swung his fist. He connected with Sheldon's jaw. Sheldon was knocked back into the desk. Leonard swung again and caught him in the left eye. Howard grabbed Leonard's arm and Raj grabbed him around the waist. They pulled him back from Sheldon.

Bernadette and Amy knelt by him and checked him over. "You're going to have a shiner," Bernadette said solemnly. Amy nodded and pressed a tissue to the corner of his mouth. He had bitten his tongue with the first punch and a trickle of blood was oozing out.

"I want you out," Leonard snarled. "This is my apartment, too. My name is on the lease along with yours. I want you out!"

Sheldon stood and nodded. "I anticipated as much. My bedroom is already packed. If you look around, you will notice empty spaces on the shelves. Raj has agreed to store my belongings until I return. I spoke to the landlord and paid my half of the rent for the remainder of our lease. That gives you 82 days to either find a new roommate or a new apartment."

"You really are a heartless bastard," Leonard said in a low voice. "You don't give a damn about anyone but yourself."

Howard shook his head. "You're wrong. We've all been wrong. Sheldon cares, Leonard. That's why it took him 6 years to do this. That's why this is so hard for him. We all have been operating under the assumption that Sheldon doesn't have feelings or a deal. The problem is, Sheldon does, but he just has a hard time expressing them."

Leonard snorted in disbelief. "After all the hell he has put all of us through over the years, the insults, the annoyances, the stupid rules and tantrums! How can you take his side?!"

Raj shrugged. "Because despite all of that, Sheldon has always been our friend. You point out his insults and behaviors, but we have been just as bad to him. We have laughed at him, insulted him, and even worse, we betrayed him. Yet he never held it against us, Leonard. He is still our friend despite the terrible things we did."

Amy moved over to stand by Leonard. "We are all adults here, Leonard. Isn't it time we all started acting like adults? You can't whine and mope and make threats until you get your way like a spoiled toddler. You need to accept that sometimes, you don't get what you want. Can't you find it inside yourself to just wish your best friend well?"

He shook his head. "How can you be so calm? You have spent two years trying to get him to be a real boyfriend to you. How can you just stop loving him?"

Amy shrugged. "I never said I don't still love him. But I'm honest enough to admit he never loved me. And that maybe the way I feel about him isn't real love. Maybe it's the desire to be accepted and loved. I have never had friends or a boyfriend before. I have nothing to compare this to. But I do know that I want him to be happy. I want Penny to be happy. I want that more than I want to keep him by my side."

Leonard looked around the room at everyone. "You are all delusional. Go away. Just.." Leonard rushed to the door and threw it open. "I don't want any of you here when I get back!" Leonard hurried down the stairs, leaving them staring after him sadly.

Sheldon slumped against the desk wearily. After a moment Amy walked over to him. "Come on, Sheldon. Us girls will give you a ride to the airport while Howard and Raj load your things into their cars."

After a moment he nodded and stood. "Thank you all. I cannot tell you how grateful I am for your support."

"Good luck," Howard said, patting Sheldon on the back.

Raj looked at him calmly. "Do not forget your promise. Bring her back."

Sheldon nodded and walked back to his room. He picked up his suitcase and followed Bernadette out of the apartment. He looked at the door across the hall one more time. Determination filled his eyes. He adjusted his messenger bag and set off. He had a mission, a purpose, to fulfill.


	6. Chapter 6

**Sheldon has taken time away from his work to find Penny. He's even willing to turn to his sister, the last person he knows Penny visited, for help. So, off we go to Galveston. Ladies and Gentlemen, say hello to the Cooper women. :)**

* * *

"Well, I'm not sure which is more surprising. The fact that you took a cab, or that it only took you 5 weeks," Missy said as she looked at her twin. Sheldon set his suitcase down and allowed her to pull him in for a hug. "Come on in Shelly. I'll make some tea while you call Momma."

He frowned slightly. "Why do I need to call Mommy?"

Missy grinned. "One, if you don't tell her you're in town, she'll tan your hide. Two, she's our mother and it's common courtesy. Three, I don't know where Penny is, but she either knows herself, or she knows who does."

Sheldon sat down at the small kitchen table and pulled out his phone.

* * *

Mary looked her son over carefully as she set dinner on the table. Missy carried in the rolls and butter. Meemaw sat down beside him and took his hand in hers. Once everyone was seated Mary said a prayer over the food.

"So, Shelly," she began. "Why are you here? I want to hear it all."

Sheldon scooped some carrots onto his plate. "Because I need to find Penny."

Meemaw and Mary exchanged looks. "Penny left of her own free will. She told us she would contact all of you when she was ready. If she hasn't done so, she must not be ready."

Sheldon nodded. "I know. It does not matter. I have to find her."

Meemaw looked at him. "Why is this so urgent?"

Sheldon looked at Missy, who nodded encouragingly. "Because I love her, Meemaw. I love her very much and I need to find her and tell her."

"What about Amy?" Mary asked gently.

Sheldon shook his head. "I have ended that relationship. I explained everything to Amy. She is hurt by this, but yet she is supportive, too. Surprisingly, with the exception of Leonard, all of my friends are supportive."

"And Leonard?" Mary asked calmly.

"He is angry and hostile. He has insisted I move out. I have done so. I am sorry he is upset, but that does not stop me from loving Penny."

Meemaw gently touched the large bruise on his jaw. "Is that who gave you the black eye and bruised jaw?"

Sheldon nodded. "He was quite upset."

Mary set her fork down and reached across for her son's hand. She was pleased when he didn't pull away. "Shelly, I love you. You are a mystery to me, but that never stopped me from loving you. If this is truly what you want, if you really do love this girl, then I will help. But be sure, son. That girl can't take much more pain. I don't want you going after her and making her go back to California if you just want your routine back."

Sheldon looked at his mom and for the first time since he was a child, he dropped all his defenses. He let them see the emotions inside him. "I love her. It does not matter to me where she is, or where she wants to be. It's just a location. I will go where she goes. I need her, Mommy."

All three women gave a sigh of relief. Meemaw patted his hand comfortingly. "You will have to wait a few days, Moon Pie. Penny is working as a bartender on the Carnival Magic cruise liner. They left port three days ago and won't return until Saturday."

Sheldon sighed. 4 days. Well, he had waited this long. He could last four more days.

* * *

He stood in the kitchen and watched the car pull up. She stepped out of the passenger seat and waved to her friend as the car pulled away. Meemaw was at his Mommy's house. They had reluctantly agreed to let him greet her alone. They wanted to be there when he told her, but he had insisted that this was something he had to do privately. He heard the front door open so he took a deep breath and tried to settle his nerves. He wasn't sure if it was a good or bad thing that Penny was renting a room from Meemaw. Granted, he had easier access to Penny. But he also had family underfoot.

"Meemaw, I'm back!" her voice called out. Sheldon turned and waited. A moment later Penny stepped into the kitchen, shrugging off her jacket. She froze when she saw him. "Sh..Sheldon?"

"Hello, Penny."

Slowly she draped her jacket over a chair and looked at him. "Why are you here?"

He moved to the table and took a seat. He gestured to the one she was behind and she sat down. "I am here because you are here. I came to find you."

Penny looked at him worriedly. "Is something wrong? Has something happened to one of the guys?"

He shook his head and she slumped slightly with relief. "No. I came because I had to. I needed to find you and speak with you."

Penny reached up and released her hair from the ponytail. "I told you I would be in touch eventually, Sheldon. You didn't have to come here."

"Yes I did," he said softly. "It was non-optional."

"Why? What is so important, Sheldon?" she asked in a tired voice.

"I love you."

* * *

He listened to the shower start upstairs. She didn't believe him. His chest was tight and his breathing labored. She thought he was only trying to get her to come back. He sighed and leaned against the banister.

At least she hadn't laughed at him. She just didn't believe him. He rubbed a hand over his jaw. The bruise had faded to an ugly yellow, as had the one under his eye. He took a bit of comfort from her anger at Leonard for hitting him, but she was also upset about him upsetting Amy. How could he convince her? Romantic gestures? Gifts? Slowly Sheldon straightened up and looked at the ceiling. Determination filled him and he headed up the stairs.

* * *

Penny stepped under the spray of hot water and sighed. What a clusterfuck this was! What on earth had gotten into him?! She reached for the shampoo bottle. She paused as his words flashed through her mind again.

"_I love you."_

She uncapped the bottle and poured a liberal amount into her hand. She was just lathering up her tresses when the curtain pulled back. She squealed in alarm and jumped. Two long sinewy arms wrapped around her instantly to keep her from slipping.

"I do not relish driving you to the hospital again, Penny."

"Sheldon! What the hell?" Penny's eyes were shut against the lather and she tried to lean into the spray to rinse the shampoo away.

Sheldon pulled her back against his body, (his very naked body, she realized with shock) and moved his hands to her hair. He worked the cleanser through the long hair gently. Then he scooted them forward until he could rinse it away.

"Conditioner," he requested. When she didn't immediately move, he bent around her and picked up the bottle himself. Penny stood frozen as he worked the condition in. Then he picked up the wash cloth and added body wash to it. He started with her back and arms before reaching around to her stomach. When he moved up to her chest, Penny gasped. When he moved below her waist, she grabbed his hand and tried to move away.

Sheldon turned her to face him. Penny looked at the fire in his eyes. She struggled to keep from glancing down at the hard length pressed against her stomach. Sheldon leaned in and pressed his lips to hers tenderly.

"You don't believe that I love you. I understand that. But it doesn't change anything. I am not going away, Penny. Unless you can tell me that you don't love me, and can never love me, I will be right here with you. I want you to give me a chance. Give us a chance." Sheldon hung the wash cloth up and turned off the water.

He stepped out of the tub and pulled her out after him. Penny grabbed a large towel and wrapped it around herself. Sheldon watched her closely as he dried off. He pulled on the clean pajamas he had brought with him and watched her hurriedly dry off and dress.

Without another word he took her hand and led her down the hall to her bedroom. He walked her over to the bed and sat her down. He moved around to the other side and slipped in. He pulled her down beside him and tucked her in close to his body. "Get some sleep, Penny. We'll talk more in the morning."

When the women came in an hour later, they looked at the couple sleeping soundly. They walked back down to the kitchen and sat down. Mary sighed. "What should we do?" she asked.

Missy shrugged. "He needs to do this himself, Momma."

Meemaw nodded. "All we can do is hope. Hope he finds a way to make her understand, hope she loves him enough to listen."


	7. Chapter 7

**Penny is off-kilter as Sheldon begins his campaign to win Penny's heart. For anyone who thinks the shower scene was OOC, too bad. My story, my rules. LOL! Just so you know, this Sheldon is a man in love. He knows what he wants, and he's out to get it. He's not about to let anything stand in his way.  
**

* * *

Penny moved her wet clothes to the dryer and added a static sheet. She turned and found Missy watching her closely. Penny gave her a tiny smile. Missy stepped in and closed the door behind her. Then she walked over and put her arms around Penny's shoulders. Penny sobbed and clung to the brunette's shoulders.

For several minutes they stood there, Missy offering silent comfort, Penny releasing the tension inside her. Finally Penny eased back and grabbed a washcloth from her basket to dry her eyes. "What am I going to do, Missy?"

She leaned against the door. "Penny, how do you feel about my brother?"

Penny took a moment to really think about Sheldon. "I care about him. He's my friend. We used to be pretty close, I think. But these last 18 or 20 months we haven't spent much time together. I was busy trying to keep Leonard happy, and he was spending all of his time with Amy." The dryer dinged and Penny pulled the clothes out. The two women began folding.

"Sheldon says he loves me, Missy. But does he really? And for how long?" she asked quietly. "I'm not smart like he is. I'm not smart like any of them are. He'll get bored or frustrated with my inability to understand him or his work. We don't have anything in common. I annoy him all the time, often unintentionally. I have nothing to offer anyone at this point, Missy. I am an emotional and mental wreck."

"Penny, love doesn't require common interests or similar IQ points. It doesn't mean you two have to agree on everything." Missy set the folded clothes in the basket and pulled Penny close for another hug. "Shelly loves you. I don't doubt that. But if you aren't ready, then don't do it. I don't want either one of you hurt. There's no rush. Take your time. Don't feel pressured into something you aren't ready for."

Penny nodded and smiled slightly. "Sheldon's not the only one with brains in this family."

Missy laughed. "Don't be fooled, doll. I would love for you to fall in love with my brother and live happily ever after. I want you to be together because I think you two are good for each other. But what I want doesn't matter. This has to be something you two work out."

Penny nodded and picked up the basket. "Thanks, Missy." She opened the door and the two women headed out.

* * *

Sheldon walked down the aisle and looked over the selection of confections. He needed to find something special. Something Penny would love.

"Sheldon Cooper?"

He looked up and grimaced. "Hello Reverend and Mrs. Hill."

Mrs. Hill smiled widely, while her husband regarded Sheldon with a bit of apprehension. "Mary mentioned you were visiting. Will we see you at the service tonight?"

Sheldon sighed. "Yes. Mommy insists I attend whenever I am in town."

Reverend Hill looked pained by Sheldon's obvious disdain. Mrs. Hill continued to smile. "Are you looking for a gift for Mary?"

Sheldon shook his head. "No. I am attempting to procure a gift for a friend."

"That lovely young lady staying with your grandmother? Penny?"

Sheldon nodded with a blush. "Yes. Penny and I have been friends for many years. I am searching for an appropriate gift to symbolize my romantic interest."

Mrs. Hill placed a hand over her bosom. "My dear boy, these won't do at all," she said gesturing to the boxes of chocolates. "No, what you want is an edible bouquet. I suggest one with chocolate dipped strawberries, pineapple hearts and berries. There's a little shop over by the Ben and Jerry's. It's called Twin Sisters Creations. That is what you need."

Sheldon placed the box he had been looking at back on the shelf. "Thank you, Mrs. Hill. I am very grateful for the suggestion."

Mrs. Hill patted his arm, ignoring his jerking twitch. "You are very welcome, dear. Good luck."

Sheldon nodded and said goodbye. He checked his watch. He should have enough time to get to the store and make his selection before his Mommy was finished at the grocery store.

* * *

Penny was just slipping on her shoes when the door opened up. She looked up to find Sheldon watching her. He leaned his shoulder against the door jamb, his hands in the pockets of his slacks. He looked so casual, so at home, that it was hard to reconcile this Sheldon with the man she thought she knew. He wasn't even dressed in a way she recognized. The slacks were from the suit she once helped him pick out. But he was wearing a light blue button up shirt, the top two buttons were undone. The sleeves were unbuttoned and rolled to just below his elbows. Even his hair was a bit mussed up. And his eyes…

Penny blushed and reached for the dress laid out on the bed. She slipped it over her head quickly and reached for the zipper. But Sheldon had his hand on it already. He slowly moved the pull tab up, while she held her hair out of the way. When he reached the top his hands fell from the zipper to her hips.

"You look lovely," he said softly. Then he placed a light kiss on top of her head and left the room.

Penny shuddered, her nerves tingling. What the hell was going on?! She looked at her reflection. Sheldon Cooper, the physicist, she could handle. Sheldon Cooper, the man, she was confused and overwhelmed by.

* * *

Not even for a new pair of Guiseppe Zanotti sling back pumps could Penny have told anyone what the church service was about. From the moment she got into Mary's car, she only noticed two things. Sheldon's hand and Sheldon's warmth. She noticed the warmth, because he was never more than a couple of inches away from her. She noticed his hand because he never released hers. Meemaw and Mary had the front seats in the car. Missy was on one side of her in the back and Sheldon was on the other. The instant she slid into the car, he took her hand in his. And he held on for the rest of the evening. All through the singing, all through the sermon, all through the prayers and back to the house. He even walked her and Meemaw to the porch. He kissed his grandmother's cheek and wished her a good night. Penny moved to follow her inside, but he held tight to her hand. Then he leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on her cheek. His hand released hers and rose to brush his knuckles down her cheek.

"Sweet dreams, Penny." Then he turned and walked back to the car. She slipped inside quickly, but couldn't help watching the car pull away.

"Are you okay, dear?" Meemaw asked with a smile.

Penny looked at her. "What in the world is going on, Meemaw? That is NOT the guy I know!"

Meemaw smiled. "He puts me in mind of his grandfather. My Henry was a stern man with most people. Stand-offish, reserved, even a bit cold. But with me he was a whole other man. Soft, tender, loving. He was forever burying his nose in my hair, or kissing me under the ear. That's the Lee men for you. Closet romantics, each and every one of them."

Meemaw sat down on the rocker and motioned Penny over to the ottoman beside her. "Penny, dear, I'll be honest. For many years, I thought Sheldon was missing something. Some vital part of his personality. I always thought that being so smart, his emotions never got a chance to grow and develop correctly." She patted Penny's arm. "I am delighted to find I was wrong. It just took the right woman to bring it out in him. What you are seeing now, is not Sheldon Lee Cooper, the boy genius, and socially obtuse scientist. No, this is Sheldon Lee Cooper, a man in love."

Penny leaned over and laid her head on Meemaw's lap. "I'm scared, Meemaw. I don't have the best track record with relationships. What do I have to offer a guy like Sheldon? I can't keep his interest. He'll get tired of me, and then I won't even have his friendship."

Caroline Lee's heart was breaking for the pretty little girl she had come to love. She had no confidence in herself. Meemaw wished there was some magic words to fix that, but there wasn't. Her grandson was fighting an uphill battle. Meemaw rubbed Penny's back soothingly.

"Take a bit of advice from an old woman who has seen just about everything. You may or may not regret the things you do. But you will always regret the ones you are too scared to attempt."


	8. Chapter 8

**Penny is very confused by the man she thought she knew, but now realizes had hidden depths no one knew about. She knew how to handle the childish genius she lived across from in Pasadena. She now is confronted with the very male, very desirable, grown up Sheldon.**

* * *

Penny snapped the suitcase shut and pulled on her jacket. Melody should be there soon to pick her up. Another 5 days at sea was just what she needed to figure out what she wanted to do. She walked down the stairs quietly, always careful not to wake Meemaw so early. She stepped out onto the porch, and breathed in the crisp early morning air. The barest light was just starting to peek over the horizon when the little blue Fiat pulled up. Penny smiled at her fellow bartender and buckled up.

"Ready for another week of horny trophy wives and lecherous old men?"

Penny laughed. "Cynic." Melody laughed and off they went.

* * *

Penny waved at a few of the bar-maids and engineers as she made her way to her little cabin. She opened the door and stepped inside. And then froze. Sitting on the small table was a beautiful red box. Roses? Who would put roses in her cabin? Penny set her suitcase on the bed and reached for the box. It was cold to the touch. She untied the ribbon and pulled off the top.

"Wow," she said softly. She looked at the chocolate covered strawberries and apple slices inside.

"Do you like them?"

Penny spun to find Sheldon standing in the door. "You got these for me?"

He nodded and stepped inside. "I know how much you like golden delicious apples."

Penny reached into the box and selected one. She took a bite and smiled. "Delicious. Thank you, Sheldon. I love this."

He smiled shyly and raised his hand. He wiped a drop of juice from the corner of her mouth. He was gratified to see her eyes darken. He hid a smile by kissing her forehead. "I need to go finish unpacking. I'll see you this afternoon."

Penny's jaw dropped. "Unpacking?"

Sheldon nodded. "I'm a passenger. Did you really think I was going to pass up the chance to spend the week with you?" He slipped from the cabin before she could think of a reply. Once in the hall he licked the juice from his finger. He smiled. "Delicious."

* * *

Sheldon sat down on a deck chair under an umbrella where he could see Penny. She was pouring a tray of bright blue drinks. At one end of the bar stood two men in swim trunks who kept flirting with Penny. The only reason he was able to control his temper was because Penny wasn't responding to them. She was polite and she smiled, but she didn't encourage them. Movement to his left drew his attention.

"Hey there, cutie." He took in the over bleached hair, the artificial breasts, the stick thin limbs and the heavy make-up.

"Hello." He turned back in Penny's direction, glancing at his watch to see how much longer she would be working.

"My name is Veronica. What's yours?" she asked with a flirty smile.

Sheldon was raised to be a gentleman, so ignoring the woman was impossible. But he found it hard to be polite. "Sheldon. Let me be honest, ma'am, I am not interested in getting to know you. I am here to spent time with only one person. She is the most beautiful woman in the world, and compared to her, everyone else seems bland and uninteresting."

The woman followed his gaze to the small poolside bar. She shrugged and stood up. "You're loss, honey. I would have rocked your world."

Sheldon watched Penny wipe down the bar top. "She already does."

* * *

Penny changed out of her bartending uniform quickly. If the last two days had taught her anything, it was that Sheldon would knock on her door exactly twenty minutes after her shift ended. She pulled on a pair of shorts and a tank top. She was just pulling her hair up into a high pony tail when he knocked.

Penny opened the door and he smiled down at her. Penny stepped back and he slipped inside. She turned and bent to grab her sneakers. When she raised back up, Sheldon bent and pressed his lips to hers. Penny gasped as he moved a hand to her nape. Heat spread through her as he pulled back.

Penny searched his face for some sort of clue to what he was thinking. "Sheldon, I don't …," Penny placed a hand on her forehead. "I can't figure you out. How can you do this? Hold my hand, kiss me, _you were naked in the shower with me_, for heaven's sake! You hate being touched by anybody!"

Sheldon sat down on the chair and tugged Penny over to sit on his lap. "Penny, you are not just anybody. You are the woman I love. What kind of man would I be if I could not touch or be touched by the most important person in the world to me?"

Penny shivered as one hand slid under the hem of her shirt to rest on the skin of her lower back. It had been a long time since she felt this strong of a reaction to anyone. Her skin tingled under his fingers. Penny blushed when her nipples hardened right in front of Sheldon's face. She watched his eyes darken, and felt his body harden beneath her bottom. Penny licked her lips nervously.

"Sheldon?" Her voice was full of desire and confusion.

He sighed and held her loosely. "Penny, I want you. But you don't trust me yet. You don't believe I love you. I don't want you to think I am only after your body. I'm not going to be satisfied with anything less than everything. I want your body, mind and spirit. I want you to love me like I love you."

Penny placed a hand on Sheldon's cheek. "I do believe you, Sheldon. That's not the problem. The problem is that I'm not good enough," she said timidly. "I have nothing to offer you. I'm not smart. I don't understand half the things you say. I have failed at pretty much everything I ever attempted. Sheldon, you are a genius. You have the respect of every other scientist in the world. What do I bring into this? All I have is my body."

Sheldon's eyes flashed angrily. "Are you fucking insane?!"

Penny looked stunned at his outburst. "Sheldon! You cussed at me!"

He glared. "I oughta turn you over my knees," he said, the twang in his voice prominent. "What the hell did Leonard and all those meat headed idiots do to you, Penny?! You are not just a body!" Sheldon's voice turned tender. "Don't you have any idea how special you are? Penny, you are so much more than simple flesh. You are kind, generous, and compassionate. I don't care if you understand science. I do. You understand life. I don't. We fill in each other's holes, Penny. Your strengths fill in my weaknesses and vice versa."

Sheldon kissed her cheek and leaned his head on her shoulder. "You are not just a body, Penny. You have never been _just_ a body. You are joy, and light, and love." They were both silent for several minutes. Sheldon's cheek grew wet where it rested against Penny's jaw. He looked up and saw tears sliding from beneath her lashes. He looked at her worriedly. Had he said something wrong? "Penny?"

She opened her eyes and looked at him. "Oh, sweetie! No one has ever said anything so beautiful to me," she said tenderly. She threw her arms around him and sobbed into his neck. Sheldon rubbed her back and tried to comfort her the only way he knew how.

"There, there. Sheldon's here," he mumbled. Penny laughed lightly and drew back.

Sheldon smiled with relief. He grabbed a handkerchief from his pocket and wiped away her tears. "I meant all of it, Penny. I look at you and I see someone wonderful and unique. Someone who I have never been able to decipher, categorize, or understand. Penny, if anyone else had annoyed or confused me as much as you do, I would have cut them out of my life. I can't do that with you. And you are the same. How often have I angered you, yet you never abandoned me?"

Penny could see the truth of what he was saying. She and Sheldon had always had a weird kind of relationship. They sparked each other's tempers, but yet, when the chips were down, was there anyone else she could trust or rely on like him? Was there anything she wouldn't do for him?

Penny relaxed against his chest and sighed. "I'm still worried, Sheldon. But there is no one in the world I trust more than you."

He kissed her forehead and smiled. "Just give us a chance, Penny."


	9. Chapter 9

**Sheldon joined Penny on the ship. He managed to convince her to at least give him a chance, despite her fears and concerns. Now he has to find a way to convince Penny that they could be good together. Shouldn't be too hard for a genius, right? Right?**

* * *

**BTW, to the guest reviewers who sent me encouragement, I thank you. Please understand, though, that I have to stick to my principles. I don't approve of anonymous reviews. I never have. It's why I joined the site in the first place, because I did not think it was right that I could leave a review that the author could not respond to. **

**And to my hilarious anti-Shenny reviewer, loved your last rambling reviews. It was utter crap, but it made me and my husband laugh. Looking forward to your next one.**

* * *

Penny tended the bar every day, and when she went off shift, they would often make their way to the video arcade, or mini golf. The week just flew by. Before he knew it, the ship was pulling back into harbor and it was time to disembark. He wished he could wait and ride back with Penny, but she would be there another 6 or 7 hours. The employees always spent time after the passengers were gone doing some cleaning and restocking of the ship. One good thing though, was that Penny wasn't on the next cruise. So, he would have a week, uninterrupted, to spend with her.

He spotted Missy's car in the lot and made his way over to it. He put his bag in the trunk and slid inside. Missy grinned at him. "Wow, you have a little bit of a tan! So you didn't just hide in your room?"

Sheldon rolled his eyes at her. "No, I did not. In fact, I spent most days by the pool or at the RedFrog Pub. Wherever Penny was working. And when she was off duty we took advantage of some of the ship's entertainment."

Missy looked at him slyly. "Is that all you took advantage of?"

Sheldon blushed, sending his twin into loud giggles. "Don't be crass, Melissa. Penny and I are nowhere near ready to engage in intimacy. We are moving slowly."

Missy shook her head wryly. "Just don't go so slow you end up going backwards, Shelly. I know you. You over-analyze."

Sheldon looked out the window. "I want to move faster, Missy. But I don't dare. I have to prove to her that I am not like all the others. She is so used to being wanted for only her physical appeal, she is having a difficult time believing that she has any other value."

Missy looked at him worriedly. "Shelly, what are you going to do? How can you convince her?"

Sheldon was quiet for a few moments. "I don't know, Missy. But I will find a way. I'm not going to give up."

* * *

Sheldon sat at his Mom's table and waited on her to join him. When she had finished talking to his brother she came over and took a seat. "Shelly, how was the cruise?"

"I think I have made progress. Not much, but she has agreed to give this a chance. She doesn't believe she is good enough Mommy. She is convinced that she has nothing of importance other than sexuality."

Mary sighed and sipped her coffee. "I know. She said much the same to Meemaw. All we can do is pray, Shelly."

Sheldon clasped his hands together on the table. "Actually I think I have an idea. But you may not approve, Mommy. So I want to talk to you about it."

Mary looked at her son with surprise. When was the last time he sought her approval for anything he did? "What's your idea?" she asked.

"I'm going to sleep with her."

* * *

Penny wasn't surprised to find Sheldon at Meemaw's house when she got there. If she was honest, she had spent the entire drive hoping he would be. She had even endured Melody's teasing remarks with only a smile and a laugh. What did surprise her was that he was apparently moving in. Penny set her suitcase down and watched him hang his pants up in the closet.

"Sheldon? Why are you placing your clothes in my closet?"

He spun to face her and smiled. He walked over and kissed her cheek chastely. "I am sleeping here now. You and I will share this room."

Penny's jaw dropped. "You just decided this? Without discussing it with me?"

Sheldon nodded and picked up her luggage. "Yes." He began unpacking her clothes and hanging them up also.

"How could you do that?!" Penny asked, her temper rising. It was Leonard moving in all over again.

Sheldon sighed and turned to her. "Because I did the math. The odds of me asking you to let me stay with you, and you agreeing were too low to risk. You would not have let me. So, I took the initiative and made the decision for us."

Penny glared. "You're damn right I wouldn't have let you! Sheldon, you can't do this! You can't just take over my life like this! You're acting like Leonard!"

Sheldon's own temper rose up. He stalked over to her. "I am **NOTHING **like Leonard! I am not trying to take over your life, Penelope Queen! I am not trying to use sex to control you! I am moving in to prove to you what you mean to me! I am not doing it for sex. I am not doing it to keep an eye on you! I am doing it because I can't bear to be without you!" He gripped her arms. "I am doing this because I don't know any other way to show you that you are more than a body to me." His voice turned soft and pleading. "Let me stay with you. Just staying together in the same room. No sex, no physicality. Just the two of us, sharing a space with each other."

Penny stared at him with wide eyes. "You really mean that, don't you? This isn't about sex?"

Sheldon pulled her in for a gentle hug. "Neither of us is ready for that, Penny. I just want to be with you. To sleep at night with you beside me. Please. Can't we just try?"

Her voice was barely more than a whisper. "You keep pushing me, Sheldon. I'm not sure how much more I can do."

He nodded. "I know. I can't help it. I have always been the type to go after what I want wholeheartedly. It's my nature to pursue my goals without hesitation."

Penny wrapped her arms around his waist. "And here I always thought I was the big ol' 5."

Sheldon grinned. "I think when you get your confidence back, you will find you still are. Which is going to come in really handy when we eventually do become more intimate with each other. I have no experience with that aspect of life, Penny. You'll have to take the lead then."

Penny looked at him for a moment and then leaned up to place a kiss on his jaw. "Fine, but if you're moving in, you have to take over cleaning the room. I hate vacuuming."

"I know," he said dryly. "And dusting, and picking up clothes, and emptying the wastebasket, and…"

Penny pinched his ribs lightly. "Oh hush! I'm going to go say hi to Meemaw. Finish unpacking to your specifications and I'll have tea ready in a few minutes."

Sheldon watched her walk away with a grin. That went better than he feared. Of course the real hard part would come later. Sleeping beside the woman he loved without touching her was going to really test his resolve.

* * *

It was almost midnight. They were both staring at the ceiling, hyper aware that only a couple of inches separated them. Penny huffed and turned to him. "Sheldon, tell me about the periodic table."

He looked at her questioningly. "Why?"

Penny rolled onto her side and tucked the blanket around herself. "I can't sleep because I'm too focused on you laying here."

Sheldon rolled toward her and frowned. "Am I so boring to you that you think my talking will put you to sleep?"

Penny laughed and darted forward to kiss his nose. "No, sweetie. I like listening to you talk, even when I don't understand it. Which is most of the time. It's just that when you talk scienc-y, you get this softness to your voice. It's soothing. I think it would help me relax."

Sheldon blushed lightly and reached out to tuck her hair back. Her words made him feel better. He threaded his fingers into hers and began telling her about each element and how it was discovered. Fifteen minutes later she yawned. Another five minute and she was lightly snoring. Sheldon smiled and moved closer. He tucked her head against his chest and closed his eyes. Before long, her warmth and apple scent had him drifting off too.


	10. Chapter 10

**Sheldon continues to push at Penny's boundaries, working hard to overcome the damage done by her previous relationships. Penny is starting to relax, and respond to his attempts to woo her.**

* * *

Penny moved into the living room and set the tea tray on the coffee table. Mary and Mrs. Caldwell were discussing the upcoming VBS at the church. Missy was trying her best to not be too obvious as she flirted with the new youth minister. Mrs. Hill, Deacon Grant and Meemaw were discussing gardening. Penny hid a smile when she saw Reverend Hill and Sheldon near the kitchen. Both wore pained expressions. She headed over that way, a cup of tea in each hand.

"Hello, Reverend Hill. If I remember correctly, you like Earl Grey with lemon, correct?" she asked with a conciliatory smile.

He nodded, grateful for the distraction. "Yes. Thank you, Penny."

She handed the other to Sheldon and gave him a smile. "I hope you will pardon me for stealing Sheldon away, sir. I need his help in the kitchen."

Rev. Hill shook his head immediately. "Oh, no. I don't mind at all."

Penny headed to the kitchen, Sheldon following behind. She closed the door behind them and took a seat at the table. She began slicing strawberries for the shortcake she was baking. Sheldon sat down beside her curiously.

"What kind of assistance do you require?" he asked, leaning over to kiss her cheek.

Penny shook her head. "I lied. You and Rev. Hill both looked like you were sucking on lemons, so I thought it best to put some space between you."

Sheldon quirked an eyebrow at her. "You lied to a religious man?"

Penny shrugged. "If there is a hell, that sin is least on the list of reasons to send me there."

Sheldon watched her silently for a moment. "Penny, do you believe there is a hell? I know you have often expressed a belief in astrology."

Penny paused her actions. "I don't know, Sheldon. I liked the idea that my life had a course already planned out when I was younger. I've never really given much thought to a deity. I can't really claim a belief in one. I can't really claim a belief in astrology either, anymore." Penny tilted her head and looked at him. "I think we are all accountable for our own actions, our own decisions. But we have a responsibility to those around us, also. Because what we do affects others. I don't know if karma, fate or kismet is real. But I do believe that it is beneficial on whole to keep in mind the welfare of others when we make our choices. If for no other reason than simple courtesy. "

She sliced the last strawberry and stood to wash her hands. Sheldon grabbed her wrist and licked the juice from her thumb. He placed a kiss on her wrist and smiled as she blushed. "And you said you weren't smart," he chided.

* * *

Sheldon was working on his laptop when he saw Penny move past the window. He stood and looked out the window. Penny was wearing denim cut-offs and a bikini top. She had a towel over her shoulder. She had been working in the garden, weeding for Meemaw. Where was she off to, he wondered. He shut his laptop and headed through the backdoor. His pulse sped up as he considered the possibilities.

Penny was fond of sunbathing. It was possible she was just going to tan. However, if you went through the trees and followed the little path, you would come to a small pond. As kids George and Missy use to go swimming there a lot. He had only been once. George had thrown him in and he had ended up with a cold.

He hurried to catch up to her, but she had a good head start. By the time he got to the edge of the trees, she was already peeling off her shorts. He paused to watch her, unable to speak as she slid the denim down her legs. He wiped his sweaty palms on his pants and moved forward.

Penny spun when she heard footsteps. Her eyes widened when she saw the expression on Sheldon's face. Her pulse sped up at the pure unadulterated maleness. He looked predatory. He strode right up to her and gripped her shoulders. Penny moaned as his mouth devoured hers. She parted her lips and his tongue thrust into her mouth. Her hands clutched at his shirt and she pressed her body against his.

A second later, Sheldon moaned and pulled away. He shuddered and separated them. "I'm sorry, Penny. I shouldn't have done that."

Penny stared at him with amazement. She could see the lust in his eyes. She could see the evidence of his desire straining against his plaid pants. She couldn't believe how much self control he had. She moved close to him and placed her hands on his shoulders.

"Sheldon, we don't have to stop," she said hesitantly.

He closed his eyes and leaned his forehead against hers. "Penny, do you love me?" he asked softly.

Penny bit her bottom lip. "I care about you a lot, Sheldon."

He nodded, knowing that would be her answer. "Then yes, we do have to stop. Because sex will only complicate things at this point. You deserve better than that." He gently kissed her cheek and turned away.

Penny watched him disappear through the trees. Several emotions washed through her. Desire, confusion, hope and finally, happiness. Sheldon was like no one she had ever known. To see how much effort he was putting into this burgeoning relationship made her feel special. They had shared a bed for five nights now. She liked the way he curled up behind her, one arm wrapped around her waist securely. Throughout the day he would often place a kiss on her cheek or her wrist.

And the talking! They had talked more in the past two weeks than they had in the last two years. They discussed their childhoods, school, family, friends. They had even talked politics one night. Penny slipped into the cool water and floated on her back. She was certain she was going to miss him while she was working next week. She had made him promise not to waste money on another cruise. Penny grinned. Maybe he could just stow away in her cabin.

* * *

"Hello, Sheldon," Raj said when his face filled the screen. "There is a slight problem."

Sheldon frowned. "What kind of problem? I have just reviewed both your work from last week and my own, even though that was not necessary. Our work is moving at an acceptable pace, and the equations are sound. How can there be a problem?"

Raj shook his head. "No, the work is good. Better than good, actually. That's the problem. In two weeks a delegation from CERN is going to be visiting and they want a presentation. They want to meet with both of us, Sheldon."

Sheldon could only stare. This was something he had worked for almost all his life. If they made a favorable impression with a delegation from CERN, they would have unlimited funding, and be many steps closer to a Nobel.

"Sheldon?" Raj snapped his fingers to get his attention. "Sheldon? What are we going to do?"

Sheldon swallowed twice. "I will need to think on this, Raj. Give me a day and we will skype again." Raj nodded and ended the video chat. Sheldon looked at the blank screen for several seconds.

"Are you seriously trying to decide what to do?" Penny asked from the doorway. Sheldon looked over at her with surprise. Penny smirked. She walked over to the bed and sat down beside him. "What's to think about? Isn't this huge? I may not know much, but even I know CERN is a big deal."

Sheldon ran a hand through his hair. "Penny, this could change everything. But two weeks? How can we put together a grand enough presentation in so short a time?"

Penny slid her hand into his. "Well, for one, you can't do it from here." Sheldon's hand tightened in hers. "You need to be in Pasadena, in your office. You need to go back, sweetie."


	11. Chapter 11

**Sheldon has a big opportunity in front of him. But it requires him to return to Pasadena. He and Penny have reached a fragile accord. What will this do to their burgeoning relationship?**

* * *

Sheldon watched her hang up her robe and slip under the blanket. Penny turned to him and smiled wryly. "Sheldon, I can see you want to argue, but be honest, can you get this presentation ready from here?"

He exhaled noisily. "Penny, I am a genius. If anyone could do it, it would be me."

She shook her head with exasperation. "Sheldon, I'm going to be working all week. It's not like we will be seeing each other anyway. Go back. Deal with this as only you can. I'll still be here when you are finished."

He tucked her under his chin and hugged her close. "Go back with me," he whispered.

Penny slowly pulled back from him. "Give up my life here for your life there?"

Sheldon frowned. "Just for a couple of weeks, Penny. Until after the presentation." Penny rose up out of the bed and reached for her robe. Sheldon scrambled after her. "Penny?"

She wrapped her robe around her and turned to him. "No. I'm not going back with you Sheldon. I have spent too much time following some guy. Doing what they wanted. Giving up my wants for theirs. You say just for a couple of weeks. What will you ask me to give up next time? Or the time after that? I won't do it, Sheldon. I can't do it."

Sheldon shook his head. "Penny, why are you so determined to not trust me?" His temper was up, and he was having a hard time keeping his voice reasonable. "I dropped everything to come here and be with you. Can you not do the same for me?"

Penny shook her head. "It's not the same, Sheldon! For one thing, I didn't ask you to! For another, your job is still there, waiting on you to pick it back up!" Penny wrapped her arms around her waist. "This isn't about trust, Sheldon. This is about insanity."

He glared at her. "I am not insane. My mommy had me tested."

She smiled slightly. "Not you. Me. You told me once that insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting something different to happen. I've done this before Sheldon. I spent years giving up one thing or another, thinking that if I just did it their way, I'd be happy and accepted. I can't do it anymore, Sheldon." Tears spilled down her cheeks. "I just can't do it."

"Penny," Sheldon reached out for her but she stepped further away.

She shook her head. "Go back, Sheldon. I think we both need a few days to think about what is really important to us. To decide what we want from each other and from this relationship. I'm not sure we want the same things." He opened his mouth and she held up a hand. "I will come to you. I will be back on Saturday. I'll let you book me a flight to Pasadena. I'll get a hotel room for a night or two. I'll come see you and we'll talk. Please, Sheldon. I need this, and I think you do, too. We're moving slow physically, but emotionally, you have me on a roller coaster."

Penny stepped close to him and looked up into his worried eyes. "Sheldon, I'm confused, and feeling overwhelmed. I care about you. I care about this thing happening between us. And I'm scared it's going to end badly. Please?"

Sheldon wanted to argue. He was certain that he could convince her. But was it the right thing to do? If he pushed her to get his way, wouldn't that make him just like Leonard? But if he didn't argue his case, did he risk losing her? What was the right thing to do?

"Moon Pie?" They both turned to see Meemaw tying her robe around her waist. "Go home, baby. Penny is asking you for very little. She just needs to think. Is that really such a difficult thing to do for the woman you love? Give her a few days to think?"

Sheldon sighed and shook his head. "No, it isn't. And yes, it is." He wrapped his arms around Penny. "What if you decide you don't want me?" he asked softly.

Penny held his tight. "I do want you, Sheldon. I just don't know in what capacity." She bit her lower lip. "And you need to decide what you will do if I can't be the woman you want."

Sheldon tucked her head under his chin. "You already are the woman I want, Penny. I don't want you to change for me. I love you the way you are." He watched Meemaw slip back out of the room quietly. "Come back to bed, Penny. Let me at least hold you tonight, since I won't see you for a week." Penny nodded with relief.

* * *

Sheldon walked through the terminal and stopped in surprise. Howard, Bernadette, Raj, Lucy, Amy, and Zack were waving at him. He walked over to where they stood. Amy looked around with disappointment.

"Penny is not with you?" she asked sadly. Zack patted her on the shoulder.

"No, she is still in Galveston. She will fly in this weekend to visit," he said. He looked questioningly at Zack.

Amy blushed and smiled. "I am taking a page out of your book, Sheldon. You have that one person who makes you feel things no one else does. Zack has always had an effect on me. So, I screwed up my courage and called him last week. We have gone out twice now, and are entering a relationship."

Zack grinned happily. "She talks circles around me, but she's pretty cute when she uses those big words."

Sheldon shot Amy a meaningful look. "I can understand Penny going from Leonard to Zack. But from ME to Zack?"

Everyone snickered except Zack who was picking up one of Sheldon's bags, and not paying attention. Howard grabbed Sheldon's other bag and they walked out of the airport. Sheldon rode with Raj and Lucy (and he sat in the back with minimal fuss) while Bernadette, Amy and Zack rode with Howard. They ordered some pizzas and settled in to bring Sheldon up to date.

Howard handed out some drinks. "Well, first of all, Leonard has moved Alex in with him. And Barry Kripke is moving in next week to take over your room."

Raj sipped his wine. "Yes, they have become close since you left. And he's been telling anyone who will listen that you stabbed him in the back."

Bernadette couldn't wait any longer. "How is she, Sheldon?"

He smiled slightly. "She is….healing. She has stopped drinking. She had to. Penny has two ulcers. Meemaw told me it was really hard on her the first couple of weeks. Apparently Penny was drinking more than any of us suspected. But, like I said, she is healing. She is working for Carnival Cruises. She seems to enjoy it. She is well liked there. When she is not on board, she stays with Meemaw."

Amy leaned forward. "You said she was coming to visit. Is she not coming back permanently?"

Sheldon hesitated. "I do not know, Amy. We have entered into a relationship. She is apprehensive it may end badly, and has asked me to allow her time to think. I am trying to give her the time she needs, but it is not easy. I try to help her, but she resists."

Lucy, looking very uncomfortable surrounded by so many, spoke up. "Fear is not easy to overcome. Sometimes, we need a push to get past a hurdle, but sometimes, we need to do it for ourselves. Overcoming something by one's own power can help heal some of the pain and hurt inside." She blushed and looked down at her lap, self-consciously.

Sheldon looked at her approvingly. "Actually, that is very helpful, Lucy. Thank you." She blushed more fiercely, and smiled shyly.

* * *

**A/N For those who have asked, no I haven't changed my mind about Amy. I still find the tv character deplorable, manipulative and sexually abusive. The Amy here is the Amy I would have loved to have seen on the show. One who was sweet, and honest, and likable. I make no apologies for the extremely OOC Amy here, because this is the one we should have gotten, not the horrible bitch we are stuck with. Poor Mayim. She does the best she can with the material she is given.**


	12. Chapter 12

**Let's review. Sheldon loves Penny. Penny fears she isn't good enough for him. He is in Pasadena trying to prepare for a very important presentation. She is in Galveston trying to rebuild her life.**

* * *

Penny sat poolside and watched the stars in the sky. Out here on the water, away from the city lights, it was easier to see them. She sipped her water and sighed.

"Penny for your thoughts."

She rolled her eyes and looked over at her friends Melody and Fran. "That never gets old."

Fran reached over and snatched one of Penny's melon balls. "Wanna talk about it?"

Penny shrugged. "Not really. But I'm not getting anywhere by myself." She sipped her water and leaned back. "I care about Sheldon. He has been my friend for a long time. However, I don't have a good track record with relationships. What happens to our friendship if this goes wrong? I will lose the best friend I have ever had. Sheldon is a genius. He'll win a Nobel someday. I'm just a bartender. He'll get bored of me eventually, won't he? He says we fill in each other's weak spots."

"Do you love him?" Fran asked gently.

Penny nibbled on her bottom lip. "I think I could if I wasn't so scared."

Melody tucked her legs up underneath her and looked at Penny carefully. "What's really holding you back?"

Penny closed her eyes and fought the tears trying to form. "What if I hurt him?" she whispered.

Fran snagged the last couple of melon balls. She looked at Penny steadily. "What if you make him happy?"

* * *

Penny stepped through the terminal uneasily. Her nerves were frazzled and her stomach was churning. She shifted her overnight bag on her shoulder and looked around. She had asked Sheldon to let Amy pick her up alone. He had questioned her a lot about that, but she had insisted. He had finally agreed on the condition that she let him stay with her at the hotel. She barely had time to look around the lounge before she heard a loud cry of "BESTIE!" and found herself enveloped in a tight hug.

She smiled softly and looked at the neurobiologist. "Well, I guess that answers one question," Penny said.

Amy looked at her questioningly. "What do you mean?"

Penny lead her over to some plastic chairs. "Well, I asked Sheldon to have you come get me because I wanted to make sure you didn't hate me."

Amy shook her head and smiled. "No. I'll be honest, I was very mad at first. And very hurt. But not anymore." Amy blushed. "I'm dating Zack Johnson, now. He's sweet, and affectionate. And he rocks my world in bed."

Penny gawked at her for a moment. "You and Zack? Aren't you afraid you will get bored? I mean, Zack is a nice guy, but he's not really intelligent, Amy."

Amy shook her head. "So? He's not book smart. But he's kind. He listens to me. He tries, you know? He makes an effort to make me happy. I had a bad day at work last week and he cooked me a special meal, and held me while I complained. It doesn't matter if he understands my work, because he understands me."

Penny slowly stood up and pulled Amy up with her. She wrapped Amy in a big hug and smiled. "Thank you, Ames. You just helped me out a great deal."

Amy frowned. "I did?"

Penny nodded. "Come on. I want to check into the hotel so we can go see the others."

* * *

Howard watched Sheldon fidget by the window with a smile. Bernadette and Raj were putting the finishing touches on the meal and Lucy and Zack were setting the table. He walked over and looked out to the street.

"Amy said they were on their way, Sheldon. Why don't you sit down and relax for a few minutes? You're wound a bit tight," Howard suggested.

Sheldon shook his head. "This is disturbing to me, Howard. It's only been 6 days. How is it possible that I feel so anxious? Is this what it was like when you were separated from Bernadette?"

"Yeah. I missed her so much, I practically attacked her the moment we were together again. But on the plus side, she felt the same. She missed me as much as I missed her."

"That just raises another question. What if Penny did not miss me?"

"Then at least you know where you stand, Sheldon."

Blue eyes widened as Amy's car pulled up beside the building. "That isn't very comforting."

Bernadette joined them. "No, but it's honest."

Sheldon turned and walked into the living room area. He faced the door and waited, hopeful, but worried. The door opened and Amy walked in. Penny stepped in behind her and looked at Sheldon. A second later, she was in his arms, kissing him hungrily.

Howard slipped an arm around Bernadette. "I guess he has his answer."

* * *

Sheldon watched her chat with Bernadette and Amy. She was telling them about her job, and asking them what they had been up to. She had missed him. She had kissed him deeply, without hesitation, or embarrassment. She held his hand most of the evening. He was hopeful that it meant she was overcoming her fears. He turned back to Raj and went over some of their points for the presentation.

Sheldon looked up a little bit later to find Penny standing behind the couch. "Sheldon, I'm ready to head back to the hotel. Do you want to ride with Amy, Zack and I or will you have Raj and Lucy drop you off?"

Sheldon immediately said his own goodbyes, and followed Penny out the door. The drive to the hotel was filled with Amy chatting about her latest experiments. Sheldon stared at his hand in Penny's. She had threaded her fingers into his the moment they climbed into the backseat. Penny rarely initiated contact between them since the day by the pond. Yet, tonight, she often touched his hand or arm. She had kissed him on two separate occasions. With all this extra stimuli he was beginning to wonder how difficult it was going to be sleeping beside her and keeping his hands to himself.

Penny said goodnight to Amy and Zack and then led the way to the elevators. Once inside, Sheldon dropped the overnight bag he had brought with him and pulled her to him. He couldn't resist kissing her softly. Penny sighed and laid her head on his chest.

"I missed you," he said gently.

Penny smiled and relaxed against him. "I missed you, too, Sheldon."

The elevator doors opened and she led the way to room 418. They stepped inside and Penny grabbed her overnight bag. "I'll just change right fast and we can get to bed."

Sheldon laid out his own pajamas and his clothes for the next day. He looked at the queen size bed and groaned. His mind imagined her spread out over it and his body immediately reacted. The bathroom door opened and he grabbed his flannels and held them in front of him. He looked at Penny and gasped. The pajamas fell to the floor from nerveless fingers. Penny grinned and walked further into the room.

His eyes roamed over her. Her hair was loose about her shoulders. Her breasts were completely visible through the sheer nightie that hugged her generous curves. The hem stopped just above the tiny lace panties she barely wore. Silk stockings encased her legs, topped with lacy garters. Peek-a-boo heels with a satin bow completed the look. Sheldon felt light headed as all the blood in his body was redirected to his groin.

Penny smirked and walked slowly across the room. "I did a lot of thinking this week, Sheldon. I thought about what you meant to me, and all the years we've known each other. I thought about the way you are with me, the way you make me feel. Do you want to know what I decided?"

Dumbly, Sheldon nodded, certain that whatever she was saying was important, but having a difficult time remembering why. Penny stopped 12 inches away. Close enough that he could touch her if he could remember how to move his arms, but far enough away that he could still see every inch of her.

"I decided that I was an idiot," Penny said softly. "Here I have the most wonderful guy in the world offering to love me completely and honestly, and I was resisting because I didn't trust me. I'm not perfect, Sheldon. I'm not smart and I don't understand your work, but I do understand you. I'm going to annoy you, and you'll aggravate me. But you make me happier than I have ever been before. I want to do that for you. I want to make you happy. I want to be with you."

Sheldon focused on Penny's words and reached out to cup her cheek. "Penny, do you mean that?"

She closed the distance between them, and wrapped her arms around his neck. "I love you, Sheldon."

He couldn't resist anymore. He picked her up and carried her to the bed. He laid her down and covered her body with his. His eyes flashed like azure flames. "Penny, you better be absolutely sure, because this is the point of no return. If we take this next step, I'm never letting you go. Please, darling, be sure."

Penny smiled and pulled his lips down to hers. "I love you, Sheldon Lee Cooper. I'm absolutely sure of that."

Sheldon growled hungrily and pressed her into the mattress. He never did make it into those pajamas.


	13. Chapter 13

**Penny's visit went better than Sheldon dared hope. She has told him that she loves him, and they have finally moved into a more physical relationship. Now Sheldon needs to focus on the upcoming presentation.**

* * *

Penny smiled as she watched Sheldon pace in a small circle. He was mumbling to himself while Raj fidgeted with his tie. Penny walked over and pushed Raj's hands away. She loosened his tie and re-knotted it. She was smoothing his lapels when Sheldon's arms wrapped around her from behind. He turned her and walked her back across the room. Penny looked up into his intense eyes and laughed with surprise.

"Sweetie, I was just fixing his tie. He's our friend. You look so jealous," she said.

Sheldon frowned down at her. "I am not jealous." His left eye twitched slightly and Penny grinned widely. Sheldon blushed and looked down. "It's just that you touch the others so easily. With me you are still sometimes hesitant."

Penny snuggled in close and laid her head on his chest. "Sweetie, it's easy to touch Raj or Howard. It means nothing to me other than friendship. It's harder to touch you because sometimes, it's almost impossible to stop. It means more to me. You mean more to me."

Sheldon relaxed and placed a kiss on her head. "I am a very lucky man," he said.

Penny pulled back and placed a kiss on his lips. "Almost show time, Sheldon. I'm going to go sit down. Bernadette and Howard are saving my seat." Sheldon nodded and released her.

"I love you," he said softly.

Penny smiled softly. "I love you, too."

* * *

She didn't understand a word of what Sheldon and Raj were saying. Instead she focused on the audience and the panel. Penny was a fairly good judge of facial expressions. She felt proud of Sheldon and Raj. The audience was riveted. The panel was impressed. Everything was going really well. Then came the Q&A portion. The first few questions were fairly simple for Sheldon to answer. He was on top of his game. Then Leonard stood up.

"Dr. Cooper, considering your history of making scientific assertions, and then recanting later, how certain are you of your findings this time?"

Howard immediately grabbed Penny's arm tightly to prevent her from getting up. Penny's eyes zeroed in on Sheldon, and she held her breath. Sheldon had turned a bit pale and he shuffled the papers on the podium. He cleared his throat and looked at her anxiously. Penny nodded encouragingly. He smiled slightly and faced Leonard.

"I assume you are referring to my contention almost four years ago that I had proven string theory while in the Arctic. I assume this since you were part of that trip." Sheldon looked at Leonard blandly. "I freely admit that I was incorrect then. The entire trip was a disaster. But, like any good scientist, I learned from that mistake and moved forward. I make no assertions with this presentation. I am merely presenting my theories and results so far. Others will have to judge if it is worthwhile."

Someone else stood and asked a question, and Leonard walked stiffly out of the room. A few more questions and the presentation was over. Penny stood with Amy and Zack while Sheldon spoke with the panel and with a few other scientists. Zack rubbed Amy's back as she fumed.

"I can't believe Leonard would try something so underhanded!" Amy exclaimed. She looked at Penny and reached for her hand. "I owe you a huge apology for all the times I encouraged you to stay with him. Until I read your letter, I had no idea how harmful that had been. I don't know how you ever managed to forgive me."

Penny gave Amy's hand a squeeze. "Amy, there was nothing to forgive. I love you. You are one of the most important people in my life. You always wanted what was best for me. I'm an adult. My unhappiness was my own fault."

Penny placed a hand on her head and sighed. "Listen, it's pretty crowded and stuffy in here. I'm going to step outside for a bit of air. Want to go with me?"

Amy nodded and looked over at Sheldon and Raj. She waved to get their attention and pointed to her and Penny and then to the doors leading outside. Sheldon nodded with understanding. Amy smiled and walked with Penny to the doors.

They moved out into the small garden area and found a bench. Penny leaned back and rolled her head back and forth. Amy watched her with a smile. "You look tired. It was wonderful of you to come back so soon and support Sheldon. Was the flight bad?"

Penny shook her head. "Six days on a cruise ship, a mad dash to the airport, a three hour flight, and then a mad dash to Bernadette's apartment so I could get showered and dressed. I'm just a bit worn down." Penny looked at Amy sheepishly. "I am sort of hoping Sheldon just wants to cuddle tonight."

"That's a switch. I remember you being very eager in bed." Leonard stepped out of the shadows. He smirked. "With me you were always interested in sex, no matter how tired you were."

Penny gripped the seat of the bench to keep from jumping up and hitting that smug face. "Actually it was more like sleeping with you meant I didn't have to talk to you. It was easier than listening to you whine."

Leonard's expression turned angry for a moment. Then he grinned nastily. "What could you and Sheldon have to talk about?"

"Life, science, family, friends, movies, music, and our future together," Penny said calmly. Amy noticed Sheldon, Howard and Raj in the doorway, but secretly motioned them to stay silent. "Leonard, I am truly sorry you are angry. I wish we could have parted under better circumstances. We gave it our best shot. We weren't happy together, Leonard."

He stepped closer. "I was!"

Penny shook her head. "Were you really? You were happy with someone you didn't trust? You were happy with someone who was miserable? I was falling apart, Leonard. I hated everything and I was starting to hate everyone. I drank like a fish, I had ulcers, and I spent most of my time wishing I was someone else, somewhere else."

Leonard clenched his hands. "I treated you like a princess," he argued. "How could that make you unhappy?"

Penny stood up. "That was part of the problem," she said. "You never treated me like me. You treated me like some fantasy girl that you could take out and play with whenever you wanted. I was never real to you. From the moment we met you focused on my looks and you built me up in your head to some ultimate goal. Some grand prize. I'm more than my looks, Leonard. I'm more than sex."

Penny looked over at Sheldon and smiled softly. "Sheldon showed me that. He likes me. Sure, we are good in bed, but we're just as good out of it. We talk. We share our lives with each other. We don't have a lot in common. But we still talk about the things we don't share an interest in. We don't always agree, but that doesn't mean we can't find common ground."

Penny looked back at Lenard's disbelieving expression. "I don't know what's going to happen between Sheldon and I, but I feel completely accepted with him. I'm not an ornament on someone's arm. I'm not just a body to keep someone warm at night. What I feel, think and want matters to Sheldon. He doesn't treat me like a princess. He treats me like a person. He gets frustrated and tells me. We have a problem and he works with me to fix it. And when I'm sad or angry, he lets me talk to him about it, without taking offense. Without making it all about him. That's what real couples do, Leonard."

Leonard shook his head. "If you think he's not going to get bored with you, you're delusional. He's too egotistical. He doesn't care about anyone but himself. He never has." Leonard spun on his heel and stormed off.

Sheldon walked over and placed two fingers under Penny's chin. He tilted her head back to look at him. "Penelope Queen, that was the most impressive speech I have ever heard." He smiled softly And pulled her close with his other arm. "I love you. Let's get out of here. I have a surprise for you. I found an apartment."

Penny wrapped her arms around his neck and smiled. "That sounds wonderful, sweetie." She turned and looked at Amy. "About what I said earlier regarding that cuddling thing," she winked and grinned, "I changed my mind."

Amy laughed as the men looked at each other with confusion. Penny pulled Sheldon down for a quick kiss. They said their goodbyes and left the university.

* * *

**And to my dear guest reviewer who hates this story so much. Thanks for letting me get under your skin. It's made writing this story so much sweeter to know you just can't stay away from it. Your reviews have provided me with more laughs than season 6 of the show has.**


	14. Chapter 14

**Penny has decided to commit to Sheldon and their feelings for each other. Now they must figure out how to make this work when they live in different states.**

* * *

They settled into a regular schedule pretty quickly. Sheldon had found an apartment in the same building as Howard and Bernadette, two floors up. He and Raj had made a very good impression on the CERN delegation. They had been asked to put together a more comprehensive presentation to be presented at a meeting in Cambridge in August. On the second Saturday of every month Penny would fly in and stay 5 days with him. On the last Saturday of each month he would fly down and spend the weekend with her. He hated to fly, but he hated being separated from Penny even more.

It wasn't a perfect arrangement, but it was the best they could do for now. Penny had just been given a raise and he could not bring himself to ask her to give up her job there. He could not give up his here, not when he and Raj were on the edge of something huge. He exited his office and began heading for the cafeteria. He was almost there when he ran into Leonard and Alex.

"Well, if it isn't king of the mountain," Leonard said snidely. Alex looked uncomfortable. When Sheldon had returned he had offered her a job as he promised, but Leonard had thrown a fit. He had went off on a tangent about Sheldon trying to steal her away like he had Penny.

Sheldon moved to walk around them but Leonard stepped in front of him. "Leonard, I do not want to fight with you. I do not wish you harm. I wish that we could have settled things more amicably, but this dispute is not solely my doing. You bear half the blame, whether you wish to acknowledge it or not. I did not have anything to do with the way your relationship with Penny ended. I did not even pursue her for more than a month after. I have been lucky enough to win her affection. I will not apologize for that."

Leonard glared at him, his face red. "You just don't get it, do you? You were always in the way! You were always interfering with me and Penny. Pretending to be her friend, dating Amy as a cover. You planned this from the beginning. From the very first day, you've been weaseling your way in with Penny. Making her take care of you, getting her to give you rides, those stupid prank wars you two were always having! From the very beginning you have plotted to take her from me!"

"You know, I've had enough." Alex shook her head. "I can't compete, Leonard. You say you care about me, but all you ever talk about is Penny. You are so obsessed with Penny and Sheldon that you can't see what's in front of your face! I'm not putting up with it anymore. I don't deserve that. I liked you, Leonard. When you were sweet and nice. But this? This hostile and obsessive version I don't like." Alex looked at Sheldon and held out her hand. Sheldon shook it tentatively. "Goodbye, Dr. Cooper. Good luck with your research." Then she turned and walked away.

Leonard stared after her for a moment before spinning toward Sheldon. "Are you happy now?!" he screamed. "You've taken everything!" Leonard spun and stormed away hurriedly. Sheldon watched his former friend leave sadly.

He walked on into the cafeteria and picked up a tray. He made his selections and walked over to a table. He opened his soda can and looked up to see President Seibert approaching. Raj was just behind him. He felt it instinctively. Something big was about to happen.

* * *

"Penny?" She looked up to see Trevor, the other Redfrog bartender, coming toward her. "Penny, there's a call for you. It's from your boyfriend. He said it was very important. You can take it in the supply room."

Penny hurried into the small back room and grabbed up the phone. "Sheldon? What's wrong?"

"Nothing," he said with confusion. "Why would you assume something was wrong?"

Penny rolled her eyes. "Sweetie, you've never called the ship phone, before. Why else would you use it?"

"Because I have important news that cannot wait for you to check your email tonight."

Penny waited a moment or two. Finally she sighed. "Sheldon, what is it?"

He breathed deeply over the phone. "Raj and I have been invited to do some work at CERN. They want us to come for two months and test out our theories, Penny. They think, as I do, that we are on the verge of a breakthrough."

Penny slumped on a beer keg and felt her pulse race. "Holy crap on a cracker, Sheldon! This is wonderful!"

His voice was hesitant. "You aren't upset?"

Penny smiled softly. "Of course I'm not! This is something you've been working toward for a long time, sweetie. Why on earth would I be upset?"

"Penny, I'll be gone for two months," he said quietly.

"I know," she said tenderly. "But it's only two months, and I'll still be here when you get back. I'm willing to wait for this, Sheldon. This is very big, and extremely important to you _and _to me."

"It's important to you?"

She smiled. "Sheldon, this is part of who you are. I love your dedication to your work. I love your big beautiful mind. Physics has been the love of your life forever. I would never forgive myself if you passed up this opportunity."

He was silent for a moment. "You're wrong, you know."

"What do you mean," Penny asked.

"_You_ are the love of my life. Physics comes second."

Tears sprang to her eyes and she blew him a kiss over the phone. "You're the love of mine, too, sweetie. Take care, and I'll talk to you tonight, okay?"

"Okay," he said softly. "Bye, Penny."

They hung up and Penny laid her head back against the wall. Two months. She was happy for Sheldon. She truly was. But she was going to miss him so badly.

* * *

Sheldon looked over his suitcase one last time. He double checked everything to make sure he wasn't forgetting anything. He was just zipping up his toiletry case when the doorbell rang. He frowned and walked over to the door. He wasn't expecting anyone, so he looked out the peephole. Sheldon scrambled to unlock the door and pulled it open. Penny grinned as he reached for her. He pulled her close and buried his face in her neck.

"Did you really think I was going to let you leave without one last night to remember me by?" she asked huskily. "I don't want you taking up with some rosy cheeked milk maid."

Sheldon looked down at her with a frown. "Penny, why would you think I would do that? Don't you trust me?"

Penny stepped around him into the apartment and dropped her trench coat. Sheldon's eyes bugged out at the black corset and garter belt. "Of course I trust you, sweetie. But why pass up the opportunity to remind you of what's waiting for you here?"

Sheldon shut the door behind him with a predatory gleam in his eyes. "By all means, remind me."

* * *

Penny looked around the airport and glanced at her watch. She was starting to get worried. She had been waiting almost an hour and still no sign of Sheldon. She pulled her phone from her pocket and dialed his number. It rang a couple of times before he answered.

"Hello?" He sounded distracted.

"Sheldon," Penny frowned a bit testily. "Where are you?"

"Penny? I'm at work. Is everything okay?" He asked.

"Sheldon, I'm at the airport. You were supposed to pick me up an hour ago." She heard the squeaking of an Expo marker on a white board. She ran a hand over her eyes tiredly. "Sheldon! Are you coming to get me or not?"

Sheldon mumbled. "Penny, you aren't supposed to be here until Friday."

"It IS Friday." She was starting to get upset. She tried to rein it in, knowing how he would get wrapped up in his equations.

"Nonsense," Sheldon said. "Today is only…..Oh sweet Jesus! I'll be right there!"

Penny hung up with a smile. She did love the big lug.

* * *

Sheldon placed a line of kisses along her shoulder as she cuddled beside him in the bed. "Forgive me?" he asked softly.

Penny looked up to him and smiled. "Of course, sweetie. You didn't do it on purpose. You're work is very important. Besides, you were only a bit late. It's not like you blew me off."

Sheldon bent his head and kissed her deeply. "I am very glad you're here. I have missed you so much these last two months."

Penny wrapped her arms around him with a wicked smile. "Have you? Show me."


	15. Chapter 15

**Long distance relationships are hard to manage. It must be especially hard when one of the participants is a whack-a-doodle genius who sometimes gets wrapped up in his work.**

* * *

Sheldon looked at his phone and sighed. He hadn't heard from Penny in two weeks. Even worse? He hadn't even noticed until last night. Sheldon ran a hand through his hair and slumped against his seat. What was he going to do? He knew why he hadn't heard from her. He had gotten caught up in his work again and neglected her.

Raj and Fritz walked into the living room with some pizzas. Raj looked at Sheldon and frowned. "Is something wrong?"

Sheldon looked up from his phone. "Raj, how long have we been here?"

Raj frowned and sat down. "12 weeks."

Sheldon nodded. "Twelve weeks, three days and 16 hours." He looked back down at his phone. "I told Penny we would be here for two months. Four weeks ago I told her we were going to extend our visit a few weeks. She called me three times two weeks ago and I neglected to return her calls."

Fritz set out some plates. "You're sweetheart? Surely she would understand, the life of a scientist is an uncertain one. Our work, it takes time and attention."

Raj looked at Sheldon worriedly. "Sheldon, when did you last talk to her?"

He looked back down at the picture of the two of them from the cruise ship. "Three weeks ago, right after she went home from her visit."

Raj shook his head. "Not good, dude."

Sheldon sprang up and began to pace. "I didn't do it on purpose! She knows how important my work is too me. She will understand." He looked at Raj. "Won't she?"

Raj looked worried. "I don't know what she'll say, Sheldon. But I can't imagine any woman would be happy being ignored for weeks by the man she loves."

Sheldon walked back to his bedroom. He took a deep breath and dialed Penny's number.

* * *

Penny looked up from her notebook when her phone rang. Slowly she reached over and picked it up. She knew by the ringtone who it was. She took a steadying breath and answered. "Hello?"

"Hello, Penny." Sheldon sounded worried and a bit sheepish. Penny bit her lip to keep from softening. "How are you doing?"

"I'm fine," she said blandly. She closed her eyes and tried to keep her emotions under control.

Sheldon sighed softly. "I am so sorry," he said gently. "I got caught up in our work, Penny. Please forgive me."

Penny stood and walked over to the window. She could see Meemaw pruning her roses outside. "Sheldon, I have always known how important your work is to you. It's a huge part of who you are. You shouldn't have to apologize for that."

His voice was barely audible. "But?"

Penny brushed away the tears threatening her vision. "But I can't be in another relationship where I don't matter. I'm tired of coming in second, or even third."

Sheldon tried to suppress the panic rising within him. "Penny, I love you. It's just that this work is so important. It is crucial that I concentrate on it."

Penny shook her head. "You forgot me when I came to visit. You found the time to call Meemaw last week. You found the time to video chat with Amy four days ago. I love you, Sheldon. And I believe you love me. But there's something about me that makes even the best of men overlook me. To put everything else first. I can't live like that Sheldon. It hurts too much to be ignored. I wish you the best." Penny paused for several seconds, but Sheldon didn't respond. She hung up and took a deep breath. Pain lanced through her heart and she sank down on the rocking chair. "Goodbye, Sheldon," she whispered to herself.

* * *

Sheldon hung up his phone and sat it beside him on the bed. Penny had broken up with him. He laid back on the bed, rolled over and drew his knees up to his chest. He had lost the one woman he loved.

* * *

Meemaw came in from the garden and found Penny curled up in the rocker. "Penny, dear? Are you okay?"

She looked up at Meemaw with teary eyes. "Sheldon called me," she said softly.

Meemaw sat on the couch. "Oh dear. Is he extending his visit again?"

Penny shook her head. "Meemaw, it's the first time he has called me in three weeks."

Meemaw looked at her with surprise. "But he just called me last week. Why wouldn't he have called you also?"

Penny looked down at her hands. "I talked to Amy last night. Sheldon spent almost an hour video chatting with her earlier this week. I called him a few times a couple of weeks ago, and he never answered or returned my calls. He also didn't answer any of my messages. He called a little bit ago and told me he was sorry, and that he got caught up in work." She looked up, tears spilling down her cheeks. "I broke up with him, Meemaw. I can't do it again. I can't come in last anymore. He says I am important to him, but he can't even take a moment to answer my calls. He can find time to call his family or friends, but not take a minute to call me back."

Penny sobbed softly. "Am I so forgettable, so easy to overlook, Meemaw? Why can't I be important to anyone?"

Meemaw moved over to embrace the young woman she had grown so fond of. It broke her heart to see Penny's heart breaking, too. Oh Moon Pie. What am I to do with the both of you?

* * *

Sheldon threw himself into his work. When Raj tried to question him about his relationship with Penny, Sheldon just clammed up and gave him a succinct reply. "There is no relationship."

When they returned to Pasadena 16 days later, Sheldon refused to discuss it with anyone. Not even Amy could get him to talk. Howard and Bernadette tried several times to get him come to dinner. Sheldon spent all his time either at work, or in his apartment. He was closing himself off from everyone and they were starting to get really worried.

Penny wouldn't talk about it, either. If any of them brought up the break up, or Sheldon, she would make an excuse and quickly hang up. They tried to stay out of it, like Penny and Sheldon asked, but they were beginning to get desperate. Their friends were hurting and they didn't know how to help.

* * *

Sheldon was looking out the window in his office when the door opened behind him. He turned and looked at President Seibert in surprise. "May I help you?"

Seibert sat down and smoothed his trousers. "Yes. You can go away."

Sheldon's eyes widened. "Excuse me?"

Seibert looked at Sheldon and shook his head. "You are quite possibly the smartest man in the country, Cooper. Maybe even the world." Sheldon nodded watchfully, suspicion written across his face.

"The odds are in my favor," he agreed.

Seibert smirked. "You are also the stupidest man I know."

Sheldon's expression turned to anger. "You are contradicting yourself, sir. Which is it? Smartest or stupidest?"

"When it comes to physics, or any of the sciences, I would put you at the top of the list, Cooper. But you screwed up and let the woman you love go. Do you have any idea how rare it really is to find someone who loves and accepts you? To find that one person who can make you truly happy, and content? Every year approximately 2 million people get married. Every year approximately 900,000 marriages end in divorce. Nearly 50% of marriages are failures, Cooper. But you had a woman who loved you. A woman who supported you. And you let her go. You are an idiot."

Sheldon looked away. "How did you know?"

Seibert sighed. "I know because I'm not an idiot. You left here to search for a woman. When you came back you were pleasant, even cheerful. Then you went to the CERN institute. You extended your stay twice. When you came back, you were more surly and unreasonable than I have ever seen you." Seibert shrugged. "Also, I asked Wolowitz and Koothrappali. My advice? Go talk to her. Fix this. Because for all your arrogance and insults, I like you Cooper. Go find Penny and tell her you love her."

Sheldon's temper, rarely seen, exploded. "She left me! She didn't give me a chance to make it right. She didn't try to fix things. She just left! I didn't leave her!"

Seibert stood and clasped his hands behind his back. "Yes, you did. You left her alone for weeks. Did you try to change her mind? Try to fix things? Or did you just let her walk away without a word? It takes two to be in a relationship, Sheldon. It also takes two to make one work. If you aren't willing to fight for it, why should she?"

Sheldon felt as if he had been punched in the gut. President Seibert was right. He hadn't tried. He had just given up. He grabbed his messenger bag and jacket. He rushed out of the room without another word. Seibert watched him hurry away with a smile. He turned off the light and locked the door as he left the office.

* * *

Sheldon took his seat on the plane and fidgeted. He wasn't sure what he was going to do when he got to Galveston, but he knew he had to do something. He was utterly miserable. He needed Penny. She was the most important thing in his life. He had to win her back. He had to convince her to give him a second chance.


	16. Chapter 16

**This chapter runs parallel to the last. Why was Penny so quick to break things off when Sheldon forgot her? Emotional survival. And not just hers, either.**

* * *

Penny looked around the small bedroom and sighed. She was going to move. As soon as she gathered the courage to tell Meemaw. She wanted a place of her own. Somewhere nearby, though, because she was going to be visiting, and she was sure Mary and Meemaw would want to come visit her. Penny looked down at the little wand in her hand and felt her heart flutter again. Pregnant. Holy crap on a cracker. She was going to have to call Sheldon.

She didn't want to, though. Not yet. She sat down on the edge of the bed and sobbed softly. Three weeks ago she had been happy. Sheldon had been sweet and tender, if a bit distracted, during her visit. They had talked the night she returned to Texas. And since then, nothing. She had called three times. Sent several texts. And she hadn't heard back from him. Last night she had spoken to Amy and had been shocked and hurt to find out they had skyped just a few days ago. She hadn't told Amy that Sheldon hadn't been in touch. She wasn't sure what had happened between them, and she was afraid to ask.

She pulled out a notebook. Maybe she would just write him again and tell him. Okay, so it was cowardly, but Penny just didn't have the right frame of mind to call him and explain that they were going to be parents. What if he didn't care? She was halfway through the letter when her phone rang. She knew from the ringtone that it was Sheldon.

* * *

Penny waited five days. She could hear the women in the kitchen. She leaned against the wall and took a few calming breaths. She pasted a smile on her face and walked around the corner.

"Hello, dear," Meemaw said with a soft smile. Penny knew she was worried about her. She was a wonderful woman and Penny loved her dearly.

Penny took a seat at the table and reached for a handful of beans. She began snapping them and cleared her throat. "Meemaw, Mary, I'm pregnant." She didn't look up, but she could feel their surprise.

"Have you told Shelly?" Mary asked gently. Penny shook her head.

"Will you?" Meemaw asked. Penny nodded.

"I would rather wait a few weeks, though," Penny admitted. "I made an appointment with the company doctor, and this week I am going to go look at a few places to rent so I have more room. Once I get moved I'll tell him." Penny looked at Mary with a plea. "I can't deal with moving and telling Sheldon all at once. My stomach is already churned up just telling you two."

Meemaw sat down with a frown. "Dear, you don't have to move. There is plenty of room here."

Penny smiled at her softly. "Meemaw, I love you. But you don't need a baby underfoot. Especially a newborn who cries at all hours."

Meemaw's eye narrowed. "Young lady, don't you tell me what I do or don't need. How are you going to raise a baby, deal with that thick headed grandson of mine and work all on your own? And more importantly, why should you if you don't have to?"

Mary reached over and placed her hand on Penny's. "Now, darlin', you know me. I love that son of mine. And I love you, too. This child is a blessing, no matter how he or she was conceived, or whether you and Shelly ever marry. But I really think you should tell him immediately. You know he won't try to push you into something you don't want, but it's not fair to keep him out of the decisions here."

Penny sighed and reached for the TUMS she carried with her. She tossed a couple into her mouth and chewed them up. "I don't intend to deny him any access to our baby. He can be as involved as he wants to be. I just need to be settled first. And to be honest, there's really not a lot he can do until the baby gets here, anyway."

"He can offer support," Meemaw said.

Penny's temper burst out. "Sure. Until he forgets me again." Penny stood and rushed from the room before the tears began to pour.

Mary and Meemaw slumped in their seats. "Mom, what are we going to do?" Mary asked.

Meemaw shook her head. "Nothing we can do, Mary. Those two are stubborn as mules. We can suggest, we can advise, but it's them that have to fix this. Maybe this baby will be the push they need."

Mary sighed and began snapping beans again. "Well, if they don't get on the ball soon, I may just take a little trip out to see my genius."

* * *

Penny walked through the mall beside Melody, sipping on her Slushie. Her phone rang an she looked at the ID and sighed. Melody pointed out a bench and they made their way over to it. Penny answered the phone calmly. "Hello, Bernadette."

"Hi, Penny. How are you doing?" a worried voice asked.

"I'm doing okay. How are you and Howard?" she asked.

"We're okay. Howie is working on a new video relay system. I have been working with a new virus that looks like it might have some beneficial properties."

"Sounds exciting," Penny replied.

Bernadette sighed. "Penny, we're worried about you and Sheldon. He's back, and he's very unhappy."

"I don't want to talk about this, Bernadette." Penny closed her eyes for a moment and tried to ignore the constant ache in her heart. "Things just didn't work out. We tried. We failed. End of story."

"No!" Bernadette cried. "Please, Penny. Surely you two can work this out!"

Penny brushed away the tears angrily and shook her head. "I have to go, Bernadette. I'll talk to you later." She hung up before her friend could reply. Melody reached over and patted her knee. Penny smiled sadly. Soon she would have to tell her friends about the baby. Once she began to gain weight Melody and Fran would notice.

"Come on, girlfriend," Melody said with a grin. "Let's go grab a couple of large brownies. Nothing cheers a gal up like fudgy, gooey goodness."

Penny stood and felt her stomach roll. Morning sickness was more like afternoon sickness for her. She linked her arm through Melody's and tried to think of an excuse for not eating.

* * *

"Hello, Miss Queen," Dr. Kimmer said with a smile. "So, what brings you here today?"

Penny bit her lip nervously. "I'm pregnant. I need a referral to an OB/GYN."

Dr. Kimmer shuffled through the paperwork and found her blood tests. "Hmm, looks like you are about 10 ½ weeks. What made you suspect you were pregnant?"

Penny sighed. "I've always been regular as clockwork. So, when I was a week late and queasy, I knew. I took two home tests and they both were positive. So, I made this appointment a few weeks ago, and here I am."

Dr. Kimmer nodded. "Okay, well then, let's do a quick exam and see how you are doing. You say you have been nauseous?" Penny nodded and laid back on the cold table. The nurse pulled an ultrasound machine closer to the table and reached for the gel. Penny took a deep breath and tried to relax.

* * *

There wasn't much to see on the screen. A small bean shaped object, with itty bitty arms and legs, that seemed to twitch nervously. Penny had smiled slightly because it reminded her of how Sheldon would twitch. She looked over the papers Dr. Kimmer had given her about diet, exercise and especially medications. She still had stomach pains sometimes, even though the ulcers were almost completely healed. And acid reflux was a pretty common occurrence. Dr. Kimmer thought that might just be stress, though. Penny rested her head in her open palm. Stress was her constant companion.

Nurse Lisa walked back into the exam room with an appointment card. "Here you go, Penny. Dr. Jameson is a wonderful doctor. You're going to love her. She's the best OB/GYN that I know. She delivered both of my boys."

Penny pulled on her coat and took the card with a thank you. She walked out to the reception area and waved goodbye to the other nurses. Well, she had a due date now, and a doctor. She would need to call Sheldon tonight and tell him. She wasn't looking forward to it.


	17. Chapter 17

**Sheldon is miserable. Penny is pregnant. Things are a real mess. Is this relationship salvageable? This chapter overlaps Penny's doctor visit.  
**

* * *

"Mary?" Meemaw walked into the living room with a tea tray. "Missy just pulled up outside. Sheldon is here."

Mary looked up with hopeful surprise. "Shelly? Do you think he's come for Penny?"

Meemaw nodded. "I believe so. He looked very determined when he got out. I don't think we should tell him about the baby, though. That is for Penny to do."

Mary hesitated and then nodded. "You're right. She needs to be the one to break the news."

The door opened and Sheldon and Missy stepped inside. Sheldon looked around the room before walking over to hug his family. He set his bag down and headed to the stairs silently.

"Penny isn't here," Mary said calmly. "She had a few things to do in town today. It's her week off, you know."

Sheldon turned and walked over to the sofa. "When will she be back?" he asked sadly.

Meemaw shook her head. "I don't know. She was meeting a friend for lunch after her errands, and then she will be back. Why are you here, Moon Pie?"

Sheldon looked at her with surprise. "Am I not welcome?"

Mary patted his knee. "Of course you are, baby. But we want to know what you intend."

Sheldon relaxed slightly. "I intend to restore my relationship with Penny. I do not know what it will require, or how long it will take, but I _will _fix this. I can't be without her. I am miserable, Mommy. I miss her so much. Nothing else matters. I can't work. I can't sleep. I have spent the last 7 weeks in a state of wretchedness."

Meemaw sipped her tea and looked over the rim at him. "Penny is hurting, also, Moon Pie. Why did you ignore her?"

Sheldon looked so frantic, Mary almost began singing Soft Kitty on impulse. "I didn't mean to! We were getting so much information from our tests, and it was just something that happened. I thought well, I'm really tired from all day in the lab, so I'll just call her tomorrow, but then tomorrow would come and I would put it off again because I needed to type up some results and before I knew it, it had been over two weeks."

Missy crossed her arms over her chest. "What about the next time you get caught up in your work, Sheldon? Will you put her off then, too? You called Amy to talk, but not Penny?"

Sheldon shook his head with certainty. "I don't think I ever _could_ again, Missy. You have no idea how much I miss her. I love her. She is the most important person in the world to me. I don't just want her in my life. I _need _her. I am useless without her. And I only contacted Amy to have an outside perspective on a particularly difficult experiment. "

Sheldon ran a hand through his hair. "It doesn't matter what it takes. I'll move here. I'll get a job teaching high school science. Whatever it takes. I just need her back," he said softly. Sheldon's eyes were bleak as he looked at Meemaw. "Does she hate me?" he asked softly.

Meemaw shook her head gently. "No, dear. She doesn't hate you. She blames herself. She thinks there is something about her that makes her forgettable. You need to prove to her that she's wrong. Explain it to her, Sheldon. Tell her how you feel. She's not unreasonable. She misses you, too. She loves you, Moon Pie. You just need to prove to her that you are committed to her."

Sheldon nodded and stood up. "I am going to take my bag upstairs." He looked at Meemaw hopefully. "Should I put my things in our room? Or do you think she will be upset?"

Meemaw looked at Mary who looked at Sheldon. "Take the room across from Meemaw, just in case. You can always move your clothes later."

Sheldon's shoulders slumped a bit and he nodded. "Okay."

* * *

Sheldon hung up his clothes and sighed. What was he going to say? He had spent the entire flight and drive here trying to figure that out. He had never been well versed in romance. He was not good at flowery speeches or grand gestures. He only had his honesty and his sincere desire to make her happy.

He hoped she would be back soon. Meemaw had said she was meeting a friend for lunch. Was it a male friend? He closed his eyes and leaned his head against the wall. He wouldn't blame her if it was. She was single. He hoped it wasn't, though. He didn't know what he would do if she was with someone else. He needed her desperately. He had to fix this.

He closed the closet and walked out of the room. He walked back toward Penny's room and stepped inside. He moved to the bed to sit down and he was immediately enveloped in her scent. Her green apple shampoo on her pillow. Her vanilla lotion on her blankets. He resisted the urge to just crawl into the bed and wrap himself in her scent.

"Sheldon?"

He looked up to see his mom in the doorway. "Yes, Mommy?"

"I just wanted to give you a little bit of advice." She walked over and sat down beside him. "Honey, sometimes love isn't enough. I loved your father. And he loved me. But we made a lot of mistakes, too. We didn't listen to each other and we fought for control all the time. You and Penny are both very strong willed people. I know you both love each other, but you are going to have to compromise sometimes. The both of you will need to make concessions on occasion. I want both of you to be happy. You were wrong to put your work first. Penny was wrong to just give up. You can't have a relationship that way. Fight for what you want. But also remember that sometimes, it's better to negotiate and compromise. Don't fight a battle just to be the winner. You end up losing everything."

Sheldon surprised his mom by reaching over to grab her hand. "Do you regret loving Dad?"

Mary shook her head. "No. Because despite our fights, we ended up with you, Missy and Junior. And it wasn't all bad. I have a lot of wonderful memories, too. It was only the last few years that were painful. Before that, we were very happy. We just lost sight of what was important and got caught up in who was right and who was wrong. I don't want that for you and Penny."

Sheldon nodded and sighed. "I just want her to be happy. I want to make her happy. Mommy, I love her so much."

Mary kissed his cheek, gently. "Then just do your very best, Shelly. That's all you can do." Mary stood up and pulled him to his feet. "Meemaw has made some lunch. Come eat. Penny should be back soon."

Sheldon pulled his mom's arm through his, making her smile widely. "I love you, Mommy."

She squeezed his arm lightly. "I love you, too, baby."


	18. Chapter 18

**Well, this is it. The last chapter. I hope you have enjoyed reading it, as much as I have enjoyed writing it. And to all you Shenny fans out there, remember, it's not important what the anti-Shenny fanatics say. They just want you to be as miserable as they are. I, for one, find their rambling, rabid rants hilarious. They get so worked up over what is, essentially, just fiction. The more they hate my stories, the more confident I am that I did a good job.  
**

* * *

Penny pulled up at Meemaw's house and got out. She had met with her boss and requested a transfer to the main office. She wouldn't be able to work on board once she got further along in her pregnancy. And she didn't want to be separated from her child to work on a ship. Mr. Holbrook hadn't been too hopeful. There weren't any positions available in the office at the moment. But maybe one would open up. Otherwise she would need to find a new job.

She had then gone to her doctor and gotten a referral to an OB-GYN. She was lucky, and had gotten an appointment for the day after tomorrow. Her very first pre-natal visit. She would need to tell Sheldon soon.

"I'm back," she called out as she entered the house and hung up her coat.

"Hello, Penny."

She spun to find Sheldon standing in the kitchen doorway. Her heart pounded in her chest at the sight of him. "Sheldon? What are you doing here?"

He walked further into the room. "I came to see you. I think we should talk about the future."

Penny felt panic rise up in her. Had he found out already? Was he upset? Penny wrapped her arms around her waist protectively.

Sheldon watched her cross her arms around her. She looked so scared. He had done this. Reinforced her fears with his thoughtlessness. He moved toward her and she backed up a step. Sheldon paused. It hurt to see her so upset.

"Please Penny. I can't take it anymore." His voice was low and pained. "I love you. I miss you so much! Please, just give me another chance! I swear I never meant to hurt you."

Penny looked at him with surprise and anxiety. "Sheldon, I know you didn't mean to. But you did."

He moved closer and reached out to cup her cheek. "I would change it if I could, Penny. You have no idea how much I regret it. I'm miserable without you, Penny. Please, I'm begging you." Tears spilled down his cheeks as he looked at her with despair. "I can't live without you."

Penny gasped as Sheldon pulled her into his arms and held her delicately. His body shuddered as he whispered "I love you" in her ear over and over. Penny slipped her arms around him carefully. What should she do? Did she have it in her to try one last time? Could she risk it? She loved him. She missed him. She was just so tired of hurting, though.

"Sheldon, it hurts so much. I don't know if I can risk it again. This is so much more painful than ever before. I love you, but I'm scared. I can't take another disappointment." Tears slipped down her cheeks, mingling with the ones he was shedding.

Sheldon placed tender kisses on her eyelids. "I regret it so much. I am hurting, too. Penny, we belong together. We aren't whole without each other. Please, Penny," he pleaded. "Please don't turn me away. If you can't love me, at least let me be in your life somehow. I'll be your friend. I'll never say another word about being a couple. But I need you in my life. I can't take this separation. I'm lost without you!"

Penny looked at the emotions in his eyes. He was hurting so much. As much as she was. Penny thought about the months together and how wonderfully happy they had been. She thought about how much she missed him. Their talks, their laughter, their closeness. She thought about how supportive and careful he had been with her. Penny thought about how deeply she had hurt them both by walking away. Did she really want to spend the rest of her life without him? Or as only his friend? A sharp stabbing pain struck her as she contemplated life without being by his side. Then she thought about what they would have together if she could just push past her fears and embrace this love completely.

"I'm insane," she murmured against his shoulder. Sheldon pulled back slightly and looked at her hopefully. She smiled softly. "Doing the same thing again and hoping for a different result." She leaned up and placed a tender kiss on his jaw. "I love you, Sheldon."

Sheldon pulled her in as close as possible and held her tight. "I'll make you happy," he promised. "I swear it."

Penny nibbled her lip. "Sheldon, there's something you should know. I was going to call you tonight." He tensed up fearfully. She took a deep breath and reached for her purse. She pulled out the paperwork her doctor had given her for the OB-GYN. She looked up at his worried expression. "We're going to be parents, Sheldon."

He sagged with relief. "I was worried you were going to tell me you were dating someone else!"

Penny looked at him with astonishment. "Sheldon, didn't you hear me? I'm pregnant."

Sheldon nodded. "Of course I heard you, Penny. You're having my baby. Can I kiss you now? I've missed your kisses."

"You're not upset?" she asked cautiously.

Sheldon shook his head and pulled her back into his arms. "How could I be upset? You love me. You have given me a second chance. And you are giving me a little you to love. The only thing that would make this more perfect is if I could have that kiss now."

Penny laughed and raised up on her toes. She giggled as Sheldon moaned and kissed her thoroughly. Meemaw, Mary and Missy peeked into the room from the kitchen and smiled. It was about time those two got their act together.

* * *

Penny glanced at her watch and then looked around. Zack and a very pregnant Amy were just taking their seats beside Howard and Bernadette. Raj and Lucy sat behind them, cradling their little one year old son, Neil. Raj looked at Penny worriedly.

"I'm sure he'll be here soon," he said. "He was just leaving the office when I spoke to him."

Bernadette reached over and patted Penny's hand. "He wouldn't miss this."

Penny laughed. "I know he wouldn't. I'm just watching for him so I can signal him when he arrives. That way he knows where we are." Just then Penny spotted Sheldon walking through the door. She waved to get his attention and he smiled and hurried over. Seconds later he slid into his seat beside her. He fidgeted a bit and Penny rolled her eyes. She stood and switched places with him. He sighed with relief as he settled into the sweet spot. Before anyone could say anything, the lights went down. A spotlight lit up the stage and the red curtains drew back.

A man stepped to the middle of the stage and spoke into the microphone. "Ladies, gentlemen, parents, and grandparents, welcome to the Spring Festival. To begin, our kindergarteners have a short musical for you."

The principle walked off and the crowd clapped enthusiastically. The class walked onto stage in their little suits and dresses and Sheldon smiled with pride. Third from the left in the front row was his little girl. Even from here he could see Miranda's bright blue eyes under the elaborate cap of brown ringlets Penny had fashioned for her. Fourth from the left was his other little girl. Christina's inquisitive hazel eyes sparkled under her blonde pixie haircut. Sheldon placed an arm around Penny's waist. How had he gotten so lucky? Three beautiful women who loved him unconditionally, and who he loved beyond measure.

Once the musical was over Penny and Sheldon collected Christina and Miranda. They walked around the school, letting the girls try their hand at the various games set up for the fund raiser.

"I'm sorry I was almost late. I was just leaving when I got a phone call," Sheldon said aloud. His friends all looked at him, hearing the nervousness in his voice. Penny smiled up at him. She loved this man. She had willingly followed him back to Pasadena after the wedding. She loved her job as office manager for a travel agency in Glendale. And she loved how much he loved her and the girls.

"You left your cell phone at home. They called it first," she said.

Sheldon looked at her, noting the excitement in her eyes. "You aren't concerned about this trip?"

Penny laughed and shook her head. "I'm very proud of you, sweetie. This is what you have always wanted. Besides, the girls and I will be there with you. Right by your side."

Sheldon grinned and shook his head. "_You_ are what I've always wanted. You and our girls. Winning my Nobel is just icing on the cake."

His friends all gasped and crowded around to congratulate him. Sheldon smiled down at his wife. Every day he woke up grateful she had taken a second chance on him. He wasn't sure how he had gotten so lucky, but he was extremely happy he had.


End file.
